One.

2011-07-27T00:11:00.001+08:00

omg hi blogger i haven't used you in a while.
Feels weird seeing all the templates and everything after being so used to the livejournal layout and stuff.
I've missed lower sec days....

Scary how we're all growing old. Sigh.

okay then, stay young forever, blogger.
I thank god for all the free time i had back then and spent them all on blogging so i read through my archives and laugh at all the stupid things my friends and i used to do.

Farewells, never end.

2010-11-07T22:30:00.000+08:00

I think i've decided to move to LiveJournal. God knows when i'm coming back to blogger.

My livejournal layout is common and plain. I'm going to leave it that way cause i'm not bothered to change it.

Blogger, i'll miss you.

-deep breath-

It's time for change, baby.

http://twicethejump.livejournal.com/

See you there.

HI

2010-01-25T23:15:00.001+08:00

oh hello blogger!!!!! :D

Everything's alright, when you're by my side.

2009-12-26T18:52:00.001+08:00

Sorry i just had to blog here. BECAUSE I WANT TO PUSH THOSE TWO FUGLY PICTURES OF ME DOWN DOWN DOWN TO THE ARCHIVES. haha.

ANYWAY. Life's pretty fine.

You should read my LJ. I think i've officially moved there. Yay. Haha.

Blogger's still nice, though.

Gota new camera. Iphone's coming up.

I knew it. I get what i wanttttt. (:

Happy birthday.

2009-11-09T11:09:00.002+08:00

On the expense of embarrassing myself, i'd like to wish Sarah Duan Dahlberg and Thaddea Chua a very very happy birthday.

The both of you, ah too many memories to even list down.

I need to meet you two soon!

I miss you!

And how many times d'you expect me to cry over you?

2009-11-07T21:30:00.003+08:00

I had so many bloody thoughts i wanted to put in pen last night while waiting at the bus stop for my dad. But i didn't have any paper or pen. Sucks. ): I should start carrying a paper and pen with me more often.

It's like we're caught up in this never ending cycle. More like i am caught up in it.

Sometimes, you feel as though you have plenty of friends but when you're down and feel as though the whole world is against you and all you want to do is pick up the phone, call someone, and start wailing at them, you can't seem to find one that could actually do the job. It just makes you feel... shittier. Is that even a word.

Anyway, i hate being caught up in this cycle and i hate falling in and out of love over and over again.

Sigh, but i guess that's just life huh.

"You can never actually understand love, but you know, most of the time, you may feel that love actually understands you."

I know it doesn't make sense when you first read it, but then again.. Hmm. Sets you thinking.

I need to break free from alot of things, because sometimes i don't even know how to fucking react to certain things that comes in my way.

I wish last night could've lasted forever. I wished that i should have had more guts to do what i thought of doing last night. But then again.

Grrrrrrrr. I need to go out. Fuck life, fuck love.

Darling we are meant to be.

2009-11-05T21:48:00.002+08:00

Yesterday's training.

45x100m

THAT'S IT.

45x100.

But it's fricking tiring i tell you.

My arms are hurting like shit now cause i didn't manage to do the 10x100 kicking.

I did all pulls. AND I DIDN'T REST.

grrrr.

Rachel Siying all slackers. HA HA HA.

some guys also Lol.

As expected, i had my legs cramps when i had on those idiotic flippers.

Anyway thank you bryan for waiting for me for i don't know how long.

And thanks for that letter, though you wrote my chinese name wrongly (you bong)

And we didn't get to say bye properly.

Anyway, looking forward to tomorrow yeahz.

(there i blogged about you, happy. [: )

Tomorrow training again.

I dont wanna go to the office.

Cries.

Period twice a month is fucking abnormal and i hate it.

SilverGoldBlack.

2009-11-05T16:40:00.001+08:00

Guess what, i'm in the office. Again.
it's kind of pointless anyway. I went in at about 3, and i am going to leave at like 6 plus.
And i'm not even doing like the company's work.
I'm helping my aunt download christmas carols from the net.
and my aunt warned me countless times on making sure it's legal.

I love holidays.

don't you love it.

Take, taken, took, tooken.

2009-11-04T16:19:00.002+08:00

In much effort of trying to get my brother of drinking a simple cup of water, i decided to have a drinking competition with him.

And obviously, i won.

Halfway through his cup, he started laughing.

A few seconds later, he ran to the toilet claiming he needed to pee.

And i drank 2 bloody cups during this whole thing.

I didn't even need to pee.

Conclusion: I have a strong bladder.

Our love is a great catastrophe that just screws the living lights of people.

2009-11-03T22:11:00.004+08:00

Here's for the nights i drink too much and spill my words;

Jodie demanded that i post this up.

Love chloe's face. Haha.

Today was... Boring.

I realised my body hasn't gotten used to the getting out of the pool at 830pm-ish with strong winds and such.

I get a cold.

A fricking cold.

woke up at 7am.

I have no idea why, that was weird.

4 hours of chinese tuition at 1-5pm.

it was quite retarded.

Darryl you were missing out on alot, it was so funny.

Anyway i practically rushed to Newton, but i was late cause i fricking took the wrong train, went down the wrong escalator (because i was talking to you, yy. :< )

Thanks aishyn for treating me to the Strawberry bread. Yumxz.

ABS WORK AGAIN FOR PHYSICAL. (:

Weird weird VERY weird exercises.

As quoted from Aishyn "FHM next hottest pose."

HAHAH.

It's really super scandalous and maybe i wasn't doing it the right way so i didn't really feel the stretch or something.

800m warm up.

Forgot, oh 6x100 free.

Slacked.

Then [3x50, 25m fly 25m back. 3x50, 25m breast 25m free.] X2

I MANAGED TO PACE PEOPLE AND CATCH UP OKAY. HEH HEH YAY! I AM HAPPY.

You go there, see how 12, 13 year olds swim, you will know why i, a person who hasn't swam for 1 year is so fricking happy that i managed to catch up and not like, lag or skip laps.

6x50 plunging, 30% chiong, 50% chiong, last lap is 90%.

I personally think all the 6 laps, 2 things on my mind throughout everything.

1. Plunge correctly. Make sure shitty goggles doesn't come out.

2. Rachel's 100% = 10% of their chiong/ slack.

Yes.

OH AND THERE WAS THIS DAMN FUCKING DISGUSTING PAD IN THE BLOODY POOL.

O H M Y G O D LA.

sick okay.

First time i see a pad in the pool.

Apparently it was dirty one. EW.

Ew to the maxxxxx.

It was in lane 2. I was in lane 1. Ftw.

Anyway that was basically it. 800m warm down. I only did like 300m.

Hhaha coach said that i could go faster.

I have a strong feeling she wants me to do back as a comp (ohmyyesiknow)

Throughout my whole 25m fly 25m back, she kept saying do my back properly, kept looking at me do my back and didn't really give a shit on my other strokes. Either that or my back is damn shitty until she says all those. HAHA.

She said after JIC (omg, brings back memories please) i have to go for stroke correction lessons. (bites nails.)

Ohmygod hazel you're so nice.
I love your post.
i think you're the only person who actually blogged about missing me during trainings.
Damn.
I cannot imagine being without you.
Not the same class, no more camwhoring!!! D:
No more trainings with you. No more acting like Marissa Tang (rememberr!)

Then again, i miss you so so so much Zephyr.

Isn't miss lee's daughter so cute!!

And of course, i'll miss those crycry periods at bubble tea shop after trainings, kallang macs after training. Running under the rain to macs. Starbucks after training. pairball with you. (i hope you'll improve with sam as your new partner!) medicine balls with you omg, you always motivate me when i feel like dying for sit ups + medicine balls you know! I'll miss free periods = camwhore time! i think you're the only willing person who would smile and do retarded things with me once a camera is in our faces. I will miss your classic "HUH!?" face. Haha. Ah i will miss you so much hazel.

2009-11-02T16:08:00.002+08:00

i am at my auntie's office now.
I was an ah long for a day.
Calling 30 over schools to get their overdue payments.
Urgh.
They owe us soooo much money haha.
Nicole said she could be a nice ah long.
yeah right.
Now i am to design a poster for my auntie.
Righto.
I am very tired.
i keep thinking of katherine moenning, this is weird. ):
I miss you shane. Haha.

Everyone loves you when you're a geek on halloween.

2009-11-01T22:58:00.004+08:00

I love Halloween parties.

Credits to Jodie.

more parties pleaseeee.

You're a showstopper.

2009-11-01T22:40:00.004+08:00

I love how candid shots show the pure emotions of a person.

I love the banners we made together for carnival day.

We were the fittest class for sec 2.

Won the orientation in sec 1.

Wre are awesome.

Never forgotten, 2e5.

Every single one of you.

i am inlove with katherine moenning.

She's so hot.

SHANE FROM THE L WORD? YEAH HER.

I love her.

I am gay, yes i am.

Happy Halloween.

2009-10-31T15:27:00.004+08:00

I have no pictures on the halloween party yesterday.

Anyway, it was the bomb diggity.

I like being dressed up as a geek.

You can go dance the stupidest way and no one will judge you, because, well, you're a geek.

yay, i should be a geek next year again, so fun.

Party was at Hazel's function room.

Went to her place at 3 plus, took a cab.

The uncle was giving me a history lesson on marine parade and siglap.

Wow.

then waited for cheryl, then went swimming.

Hazel looks really really funny in goggles. I like laughing at her.

Especially when she "cleans" her goggles in that retarded way of hers.

She likes to cheat in swimming competitions. ):<

then we went up, wanting to go to her place to shower, then jodie called, i got lost trying to find the function room, only to find myself at the pool again cause the function room was right next to it. -_-

Showered at the changing room.

Party was fun though there was 14 people.

Jodie as an evil kid with really really scary eyeliner.

which scared herself. HAHA.

Nicole as an ah lian.

Zomg, after knowing her for like 2 years, i never actually saw her in that light until yesterday.

Woah. Mega ah lian. Hair super staright (which was pretty), fringe down (which looked okay), colourful clips all stuffed under her hair. Pony tail high (which was surprisingly fine!).

Conclusion: Nicole is meant to be an ah lian.

Her slippers made her taller and she was happy.

Hazel was an ah beng. But when she rolled up her sleeves and pulled up her jeans, it's like an hawker centre auntie. Haha.

Kenny was a serial killer with a real knife and a scary shitass mask,

Nicky was his victim with a t shirt showing one of his nipples. HAHA.

Pamela dressed up as nothing but thanks to nicky SHE HAD A BEARD :D HAAH MEGA FUNNY.

And had random scribbles on her face.

Nicky as well.

Later part of the party, almost everyone had scribbles on their faces as well.

Isabel as a scouts boy, borrowed outift from her brother.

Chloe as a hippie.

I like her head band. :D

Rena as Hazel's slut girlfriend, but failed!

Everything grey!

But could see her bra so can pass off as a slut. :D

AHAHA.

Namrata was supposed to be a witch (her nails were so scary)

but Jodie said she looked more like a goth cause she was all black,

Jasmin was a... indian belly dancer? i have no idea . AHAH.

we prepared way too much food.

Truth or dare was funny while it lasted.

Prank calls! Jamaican accent. So funny.

Then random dancing.

I love my geek-dance solo.

Whoo hoo.

Couples dance.

Mad dancing.

Everyone learning my awesome dance. (geek dance, and geek robot dance)

HAHA.

Went over to Jodie's place after the party.

With Kenneth Nicky Isabel Chloe.

Played Go-fish.

Nicky's farts are.. hilarious.

Ruth came over.

I will get back at you when my brain is working. >:(

Mum picked me up at 12.47am.

I was happy and sad.

Sad cause i couldn't play anymore.

HAHA.

But i was happy my curfew was that late. hee hee.

Slept till 2pm the next day.

Saturday was quite boring.

Training.

It stopped halfway, cause it was raining.

Missed APSC rainy days so much!!

Talked about how Gohrilla and fishtail would run out of the pool screaming like girls when lightning strikes when swimming in blue comp.

HAHA.

And us still swimming when an jiao lian screamed at us to get out of the water in yellow rays haha.

I realised the people in Swimfast, like girls and guys don't really talk to each other. Don't really mix.

Quite weird. Cause in YR, we all mix around. Even remembered when marcus went on a pushing spree, push everyone into the water.HAAH.

And when he came early, he wore his trunks on his head and started running round like a retard. AND HIS HUGS!!

Ah miss them. ):

Swimfast is so weird, why the guys don't mix with the girls. Sigh.

Talk about fitting in. -_-

Okay. i finally updated.

You make me smile.

2009-10-30T09:14:00.001+08:00

I shouldn't have set the alarm at 8.

I look like a drunkard watching 90210 on youtube.

Because i slept at 3.

2009-10-30T00:25:00.000+08:00

Sorry i couldn't help but repost this.

HAHAHA.

I love you nicole.

& this is the part where we say we're in love.

2009-10-29T22:59:00.002+08:00

The past week has been.

Well.

Fast.

I want to post up pictures, but i'm lazy. Maybe the next post.

Tuesday.

Went out with Jamie Jodie Nicole to make the adverts for Carnival day. Awesome. Haha.

Had lots of fun.

Did it at the esplanade, it has a lot of space, surprisingly.

And then went to marina square for dinner.

MUDPIE IS AWESOMEZXZ.

it was funny when jamie and i saw jodie on the train ride home cause she was rushing.

-_-

Skip skip the days till today.

Thursday.

It's a surprise that i haven't gotten a sore throat.

Went around advertising.

Funny, fun. Everything i needed to channel my inner anger in. :D

"BUY TAPIOCA CHIPS. WANT HAZEL'S AUTOGRAPHS, 10 CENTS MORE!"

"Wow you're damn good at making business huh."

No one bought the chips anyway. HAHA.

Brownies were a huge seller.

Kersari was a failure. :/

But overall, it was a lot of fun.

ChinChow & SoyaBean.

"WE'VE GOT NUTRISOY SOYA BEAN AT 50 CENTS!!"

Hazel's threat.

"Eh you don't buy ah, i throw the cookies at you ah, then you pay for the cookies still okay! -stares, with nostrils flaring-"

HAHA SO FUNNY.

Henna all over me.

Slacked with sec ones at the last part.

Had fun camwhoring. :D

I love Juzan's cam.

My toe still hurts. :/

I WILL MISS YOU 2E5.

Felt like P6 all over again.

Like graduation and everything.

Sigh.

No more screaming at nicole.

No more camera snapping pictures of us.

No more macs day.

No more blur moments of hazel.

No more camwhoring during free periods.

No more Darrell moments with Stacy.

I think when i watch the darrell video, i'll remember stacy. Haha.

And science, and the ohms with bavithra.

The hole-puncher. My ex-husband.

Selina and Shalini running over to me when i was crying about my math results.

Serena and our M1 sign.

AH.

I am sad.

2E5 forever.

I will miss you.

Don't drift.

For you, who i thought we could be together.

2009-10-27T01:16:00.001+08:00

For you, i think you know who you are.

Read the lyrics.

Flightless Bird, American Mouth

2009-10-27T01:00:00.002+08:00

There's something about that song that makes me cry. No, it's not the lyrics.

Seriously, i should stop watching videos. They make me cry for no reason. sigh. This is a good song though.

This video received alot of "stick to the original melody." It's a damn nice way of playing the song. Somemore she's playing the whole song by ear. She's great. I love viva la vida.

No such things as fate, no such things as coincidences and meant to be.

2009-10-26T23:50:00.004+08:00

I want to read the script of 500 days of summer.

I will attempt googling it.

-hang on-

OH MY GAH. THERE IS!!!!

okay i am downloading it. :D

teehee.

YAYYY OMG OMG OMG. :D

I AM SO HAPPY.

haha.

I think i totally lost myself there for a while.

I like reading scripts.

So nice to read.

Today was.. boring.

Partly because my ears were blocked today, for some reason.

Surprise for 2e5 on thursday. :D

I am starting to get the hang of "go fish".

I am also getting kind of glad i never did or will never have a boyfriend having all my friend's numbers and spamming them with messages and weird questions when i have a fight with him and doesn't answer his calls.

Phew for that.

My mum doesn't give a hoot if i want to go for obs or not.

"If you don't want to go, i can always write you a letter, the school won't force you to go if i strongly refuse to let you go right."

I don't want to go for obs.

Anyone not going?

Shit, just now, i felt like kissing someone again.

Damn, or even hugging.

Totally impossible.

I don't even know if the feelings' true.

My heart goes beating real quick when i see you, it goes even faster when i see you smile.

GRRRR.

But then again-

when i read your message today, it made me giggle again.

Happy that you actually bothered to tell me you were leaving.

i miss the sound of your voice.

I really do.

AND

JUST TO PROVE THAT I AM NOT WEIRD BY DOWNLOADING THE SCRIPT OF 500 DAYS OF SUMMER, HERE'S ONE.

SUMMER :

I woke up one day and I knew.

Tom says nothing.

SUMMER :

I knew I could promise him I’d feel

the same way every morning. In a

way that I... I never could with

you.

And there’s not much else to say after that.

Tom gets up to leave.

TOM :

You know what sucks? Realizing that

everything you believe in is

complete bullshit.

SUMMER

What is?

TOM

Destiny, soulmates, true love. All

that stuff. It’s nothing more than

silly childhood fairy tale

nonsense, isn’t it? God!

Yeah pure bullcrap.

Awful things happen all the time, but don't let it kill you.

2009-10-24T22:25:00.002+08:00

Went for SwimFast training today!

Made new friends, FAMILIAR FACES.

SARAH REMEMBER CHERYL! that little girl in pink swimming cap with the guy kenneth whom we always said liked her? You know, the one in blue competitive?! then she quit? i saw her!! And kenneth too! haah.

COOL RIGHT.

Swimfast is really.. FAST.

I am serious.

We are in group 2! shocking.

1st hour, physical.

Running, crunches push ups whatever lah.

Stretches.

Then pool.

600m IM (is it?)

I can't remember.

I just know it was super tiring.

I haven't swam in sooo long.

My swimming stamina sucks. D:

Btw i went with aishyn.

Got new goggles. I specifically wanted to get the reflective ones. HAA. Costed me $40 bucks.

We were so nervous we peed too much i think.

AHAH.

I am tired and i think i am going to get double muscle aches cause i haven't recovered from netball's muscle aches. Going to swim on tuesday i think. Yay.

I gotta do tuition homework tomorrow.

Aish, am is ponning church tomorrow. D:

Apparently, it's her family's sleep in weekend -_-

i wanna see keith, miss him like shitzo.

Okay i think there's another youtube genius.

Go and search : mreebee3

she's 15 and taiwanese and bulgarian.

Cool mix. She's super pretty.

And she plays her instruments (guitar and piano) by ear. OMG AND SHES SO FRICKING GOOD.

And i now then know "viva la vida" is about Napoleon. Cool.

You should listen to her versions. They're really good.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f4wduRzCCCo&feature=player_profilepage - Put your records on

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bYogyGQjiCE&feature=player_profilepage - Flightless Bird, American Mouth (My current favouriteeeeee.)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yqRUgnoPzIA&feature=player_profilepage - Viva La Vida, her version is super nice and you have to admit that her piano skills are damn good cause she's playing by ear.

ARGH WHY ARE PEOPLE SO TALENTED.

What i am currently wearing (i find my outift quite hilarious)

Class tee, boxers, white socks which are way above my ankle and i am sitting next to 2 readers' digest and a guitar on my leg.

Yay for random inserts.

Nothing left for you to do anyway.

2009-10-23T16:29:00.003+08:00

Haha, i want to yay about 3 things.

YAY FOR LITERATURE.

YAY FOR SWIMFAST (zomg, they damn cool.)

YAY FOR ENGLISH.

1. Topped the cohort (apparently) for literature. 43/50. Is it 1st or 2nd? Idk.

HAHA, super happy. It was pure luck, i swear. I only read the whole book of Animal Farm, once.

The night before lit exam, i was on the phone with nicole. Talking about lit. That was my animal farm revision.

Freaky. And the unseen prose, i was just bullshitting my way through. Yay. :D It saved my butt for my average as well. Hee hee.

2. I got my A2 for english overall. That's something to rejoice about.

3. SWIMFAST OMGOMGOMOMGOMGOGOMGM. SO COOL. Apparently, their training's are like 3 hours-

1st hour- ONLAND TRAINING. (does APSC have that?! Only R&W or whatever name they call it now.) onland training includes: Running, gym (YAY), and like other sports like soccer or basketball. (DOUBLE YAY.)

next two hours- swimming.

HA HA HA. THIS MEANS I WON'T GROW FAT EVEN IF I QUIT NETBALL CAUSE I WILL HAVE ONLAND TRAININGGGG. Hahahah i am so happy.

But then swimfast so strict, they force you to take part in inter-club competitions no matter what, if not you'll get expelled or something. And apparently, we have to go for the trainings for one week then the coach will see us then tell us which group we'll go into, then after that start training. AND, we have to submit applications by 30th oct. And then they not taking anyone else in already. WHY, cause they want to maintain their quality. Does APSC do that? no, they just take in as many as they can to enjoy the shitload of dirty money they earn. (:

I wanna go swimfast, but then i need to quickly change my cca AND get my 2 cca points AT THE SAME BLOODY TIME. argh, head ache, cause i can't find a good cca to change to and alot of people are telling me different ways on how to earn cca points, and i am confused. WHERE WAS MR TAN TODAY ARGH.

YAY YOU SWIMFAST. :D

Okay today was rather boring, i hate my science results. So screwed.

Maybe going to hazel's CLEVERLAND tuition. Idk yet.

Lunch at Yoshinoya with hazel cassie emily. We bitched, alot. Ah feels good, haven't bitched in a long time. Haha.

Walked around, ice cream. Giant, halloween shopping. HAHA. Went home.

I am so eggicited to go for trials next week! YAY.

Omg, i just called.

they have 5 groups.

Group one is the Taoli, quah tingwen group. So we obviously have no hope going there.

Group two and three is our only hope. 4&5 is like small kids.

And Coach Li who coaches group 3 is taoli's mum! WHO USED TO COACH IN APSC, WHO USED TO COACH MY BROTHER ONE TO ONE. HAHAHA.

So cool.

Okay we are supposed to go there and swim. I get nervous very easily and on top of that, i haven't been swimming competitively for like 1 year. My god, what if my feet cramps up while swimming. Confirm die one. ARGH.

Let me tell you one time.

2009-10-21T23:03:00.001+08:00

We-

are so not sane when we're on msn now.

HAHA.

I can't wait for swimming i can't wait i can't wait.

Whereas, I-

can wait long time for netball training (which is sadly, tomorrow)

Ah swimfast lady, i want the email by TOMORROW.

TOMORROW.

Then we can hurry join ad hurry train for nats.

yay yay yay aishyn.

SBF TIME MANZXZZ.

tee hee.

Remember to pace each other when going for time trials.

Shit, i think i forgot how to wear a swim cap. O:

And my hair..?

HOW TO FIT.

GAH.

I will rant to aishyn.

haha, i am high.

Justin Bieber is 161cm.

NOOOOOOOOOOOO.

i am now sad.

Blog game, let's play. The Ex-Crush Playlist.

2009-10-21T21:25:00.003+08:00

Rules, YY:

"Mm. Where to start? Well. 1234, Hazel and I are playing a game. Called The Ex-Crush Playlist. Yeah. Post a song, explain, a short anecdote about your ex-crush, ex-lover, ex-nearly-girlfriend or ex-girlfriend or WHATEVER, I don't care. The wittiest one (also with the most hits) wins. It's quite simple, really. Haha. Also, we have to link to each other's TECP (The Ex-Crush Playlist) blog posts at the end of the post. You can choose not to reveal the idenitites of the person. But me, of course, I have to keep it down for fear of face distortion. If looking for TECP posts, there's a tag going TECP. Ha. Have fun reading about our deepest, darkest secrets."

Okay, i will type down the name here, for more kicks. :D

And more hits. HEHEHEHHEHEHEH.

Song: Lovers In Japan, by Coldplay

Reminds me of: Bryan Keefe Cresswell.

Lovers, keep on the road you're on
Runners, until the race is run
Soldiers, you've got to soldier on
Sometimes even right is wrong

Yes, i used to like him. Or maybe i still do, not so sure. But that song reminds me of him because i was playing it on my touch and then he was on the phone, then i asked him to go listen to the song, and then, the next week, he was already playing it for me on the piano. And he also played that song for me (or us- Jamie Nicole Jodie) during drama night. Yeap, and he's madly inlove with that song now (i think) because of me. Heh heh.

The lyrics doesn't remind me of him, mostly it's just the song so yeah.

"Well you know what they say, when you are broken hearted, turn to literature, i mean, it's the best cure!"

2009-10-21T20:13:00.003+08:00

They met in camp, she thought he had really nice eyes, and still likes them fyi.

She was there for him when he lost his first kiss, when he got his heart broken, when he fell inlove again, and got his heart broken again. She was there throughout everything. She never thought that she's be stupid enough to fall for her best friend.

And he was there when she cried over the most stupidest stuff like how her parents didn't let her go to a sleepover and how her life sucked cause she has no more money. Well, he was there, and she especially liked it when he tries so hard to comfort her and give examples in his life to make her know that she's not alone. She never thought she was anyway. She always felt so special after hearing whatever he said to comfort her, and makes her want to snuggle up to him and give him a huge hug.

She remembered the first time he promised her something, to go for a concert.

Her heart was racing at 7pm, she constantly kept checking her watch, he told her he was going to be late.

And when he came, even though in t-shirt and jeans, her heart was pounding and she found it so hard to keep her cool. At the back of her head, she scolded herself for thinking that he wouldn't make it. And then promised herself never to doubt him again.

Then when they fought, she screwed herself up, day and night.

Well, mostly in the night. You'll never know what she did.

In the mornings, she'll drag her feet into school, go through the motions and try to keep her profile low, and try to smile as much as she can.

And she was so sure she was doing so much better than him. She imagined him to be torn apart, crying himself to sleep every night, calling all the girl friends he knew trying to seek comfort in them. But then again, maybe he was doing better than her, he was still joking around with his friends, not hurting at all. She was on a losing streak. She cried herself to sleep, drank till she couldn't remember what she did the night before, danced till she got so tired, tried to sleep as late as she could because she didn't dare to close her eyes, afraid that he'd appear in her dreams.

Then he said he wanted to sort things out, face to face at the playground near her house. Her heart skipped a beat. It felt just like romeo and juliet, and she blasted that song for 2 hours dancing and singing along with it. She had totally forgotten the anger just like that. those sleepless nights, she forgot, she was just looking forward to that friday at "9 plus." She was already starting to plan the excuses in her head.

9plus came on that friday, she told herself not to believe but was still hoping.

The clock hit 10. He broke his promise.

And when she kept telling herself to give up on him, he called and apologized to her. In chinese and in english. It made her laugh like a silly girl and forgot the things he lied to her about.

He told her again that he'll meet her at her house. He didn't. She just kept losing faith in him, and in that friendship they had.

"he just doesn't want to give people the impression he cannot go out." Her friend said.

Well fuck it, if he really treated her as a friend or loved her as a friend or actually liked her, he wouldn't be so prideful and say a shitload of lies. I'm quite sure she'll understand that he couldn't make it, but all she wanted was the truth. Not lies.

The thing she hates most is people lying to her.

Then she decided to give him another chance. He made himself sound so sure that he was going to meet her, she totally fell for it. Fell for it to the extend, that she lied to her parents, went to the library, went to pp, then took a cab to kallang and "studied" there for 4 hours. And he didn't tell her that he wasn't going to come. And the funny thing was, when she was in pp, she told him to tell her the truth, and he said "I promised. I will go."

He lied. Again.

Yeah sure, being a girl, she moped around, got drunk, posted emo posts in her blog, got paranoid, went crazy for a while. But she got over it, if he can lie and doesn't get hurt, but she's the one hurting like mad, he's to the advantage, so why let him have it? She threw away all the thoughts of her getting together with him and decided to not be friends with him.

I guess she's not completely over it, but i'm sure she's slowly getting over it.

People come and and go in our lives, he's just another asshole who just makes everything more complicated for her.

Whereas, i-

can totally understand and feel for that girl!

I mean fuck those guys who only know how to tell lies because they can't put down their pride!

my fucking ass if they say if they have no fucking choice.

And because he's a guy, and guys don't get attached and guys don't ever give themselves over completely. And guys lie.

I'm a walking glowstick, a special shade of orange-red.

2009-10-21T17:12:00.003+08:00

I am officially glowing.

GLOWING.

It's fun spending more than 3 hours sitting with Carissa Zhi Ying Shalini and Christine.

And with Sarah being so near and throwing ripped out pieces of our answer schemes with lame jokes on it-

Script checking is quite fun. (:

Okay i am burning, so i am officially hot. :D

haha LAME.

Lunch at mos, haven't been seeing any unglamness in a long timeeee.

SWIMFAST HERE I COME! :D

I need to ask sarah dahlberg to go.

Hmm.

YAY SWIMFAST FUCK YOU NETBALL BYEBYE.

"Karma is a motherfucker, and you'll get yours."

2009-10-20T21:01:00.003+08:00

I am really, really REALLY sunburnt.

So sun burnt, it sucks.

And it hurts as well.

So i am on my bed, i think i haven't moved any part of my body (except the fingers) for the last hour cause it hurts like fuck.

i am moving my fingers around this keyboard like a retard.

Yeahhhh.

I JUST REALISED.

IAMFUCKINGBLACKSHITSHITSHIT.

i'm not red anymore. Fuck, i changed colour. ZOMGWTH.

arghh this is karma, pure shitass karma for being so racist.

urgh.

-_-

Kite flying is fun, we should do that.

Picnics too.

AND MORE PARTIES PLEASEEEEE. (when Os & exams are really, really over.)

Hot coke sux.

New friends are love.

Nc16 movies! (failed. We should all get fake IDs, really)

I think going out with people who are like 18,19 are cool, they don't mind paying :D hee hee.

FUZZY WUZZY GAME IS A SHITTY GAME.

fuzzy wuzzy is just a fussy pussy. -_-

What,

Fuzzy wuzzy likes the fullerton hotel, but hates the hotel.

Fuzzy wuzzy likes the walls but hates the house.

Fuzzy wuzzy likes boobs, but hates breasts.

WTF.

how on earth do you figure the god damn logic.

Oh yeah,

Bryan?

Your pants are on a hugeass fire. (:

"Fyi, i like train rides with you, especially the ones that terminates at Aljunied at 12 noon, so i can be with you longer."

2009-10-19T19:27:00.002+08:00

Should i start rambling about yesterday first or today. Since today is so boring, i'll start with yesterday.

I have to exclaim this before i forget.

OMFGGGGGG, FEI BA IS DEADDDDDDDDDDD. ARGHHHHHH, SO SADDDDDDDDD. D:

You know, fei zai's daddy? yeah, i saw him the last time, now he's dead.

CRIES CRIES CRIES CRIES.

Okay, so i skipped church yesterday cause i woke up late, so we went to balestier to eat minced pork noodles. Then parents dropped me off at plaza sing, met emily and rena there. They tried to prank me in the toilet but failed so miserably. -_-

Then took the mrt, met yy at Paya Lebar. (Delete that super unglam picture of my btw!)

Went to Animal League, washed the kennels, had the epic ernie & the bucket & the hose showdown AGAIN.

the dogs were rather restless so it was werid, especially all my favourite dogs. They were super sianzxz.

So i made new friends.

Ricky isn't the only dog who knows how to shake, ahah.

I got scratched by that black doggie, idk what's her name. But yeah, got clawed by her. Cause she wanted me to pet her. -_-

Alot of injured dogs yesterday. D:

Sad.

Some auntie bought me and yy drinks! Yay.

I think i am getting better at feeding the dogs. (:

Cash is super playful and he's a perv, omg, he should go be bffs with yy.

heh heh.

Emily and Rena left, yy and i stayed for a while, played with the dogs for a little while.

Then we walked OUT.

WALKED.

So bloody long.

Yy cannot sing, high five.

Went see the puppy places.

OMGOMGOMGOGOGMOGOMGMGOGMO.

SO CUTTTTEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

But i hate seeing puppies in cages, and they were all in cages and they looked super sad. ):

I had the urge to go buy them. Or steal them. :/

Sigh, the dogs were seriously damn fucking cute.

Yy and i were singing like drunkards and yeah we screwed up the lyrics of "teardrops on my guitar".

Haha.

it was fun while it lasted.

She laughed so hard at the "mimi" joke. I can never get enough of it. Heh.

I think we waiting for like half an hour for the bloody bus to bring us to the mrt station we almost wend mad.

Yy owns, she bought strawberry milk.

We saw (i think it's a china woman) picking her nose, doesn't she have any shame?!

Sheesh, so gross.

And flicking her booger to her less-than-20cm from her boyfriend. That guy should just dump her, seriously.

Dan Ryan's for dinner, the best place EVER.

I LOVE THEIR FOOD THERE.

i ate the world's smallest sundae. AHAH (that's what they said in the menu)

My dad is so retarded. He claims he doesn't like me cause i'm fat. (HYPOCRITE DADDY, YOU HYPOCRITE.)

Mum's still the best!

So that was a Sunday quite well spent though my dad was sore at the fact that i couldn't spend time with him and on top of that he had to pick me up from the mrt station and me smelling like dogs. -_-

Random insert: Idk why i have bloodstains on my fingers. WEIRD!

Today was shit.

I think.

Haha.

4 hours of chinese tuition, and my holidays are HALF RUINED.

Cannot believe i am going to be spending 4 hours of chinese tuition on the 28th and 31st december. Fuck.

Anyway, the guys never fail to cheer me up when i feel sleepy during tuition.

Even though there's some awkwardness now cause Darryl's an asshole, it was still fun.

D emoed-got pissed on the way to the mrt station and on the train ride. D:

Hope you're feeling better, well DUH, cause i cheered you up. heh heh heh.

Then came home.

I am going to sms miss lee and tell her i cannot make it for training tomorrow cause i have a sinseh appointment cause my toe is hurting like fuck.

And apparently, my sinseh is a physiotherapist too! I should ask him to check my clicking hip at the same time. :D

Nothing much. Sigh.

My muscles are still aching btw. Is it supposed to be a good sign.

I need my comfort food.

Fuck you,this is one reason why i so badly want to quit it okay.

Yes i know i suck, do i have to get this fucking shitty treatment from you. Everytime i get convinced to stay, you just find ways and means to make me want to get out of it. You seem to have some fucking problem with me you know. I think me leaving doesn't really make a huge difference in your team since i'm always the fucking benchwarmer. I wasted one year with you, this is what i get, shitty treatment compared to everyone else.

FUCK YOU, FUCK IT, FUCK EVERYONE, FUCK NETBALL.

I'm going back to swimming.

Don't say you're sorry, cause i'm not even breaking.

2009-10-18T01:18:00.002+08:00

Finally, after 1224567 hours, i have edited all the pictures! :D

YAY ME.

HAZEL YOU BETTER LOVE ME.

ah i am off to sleep.

Animal league in 11 hours' time. Yay.

I think i'm either so hungry my stomach's growling, or i'm having stomach aches from the oysters we ate for dinner. Gr.

I got suaned by Rena today, can you believe it.

my neck's aching.

I realize i need to complete my chinese tuition homework cause i have tuition on monday.

Damn.

Did i mention periods suck, and i'm still gonna go animal league, not giving a hoot if alot of dogs sniff my ass (again). Rawr, lucky and fei zai, i am doing this for you.

Time is never enough, when we're apart, what are you thinking of?

2009-10-17T18:04:00.004+08:00

Do you sometimes feel that time flies way too fast for us to catch up with.

Went out with Mistika today, haven't went out with her in like a year. I love her camera, we went to Pennisula Plaza, to get her guitar strings and we got picks. Aha.

Went to esplanade, went sightseeing, the glorious dead. Then to marina sqaure, then citylink mall.

"And I want to declare i have the best father in the world!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

OMG MY DAD JUST SAT HERE AND TYPED THIS DOWN HAHAHA. my dad's alter ego is emerging. Oh the fear.

Sat down at the pavillion at esplanade.

Talked, laughed.

I don't know how to describe it, but it just feels so nice when you sit with your best friend and even if there's silence, there's no awkwardness and we just, well, enjoy each other's company.

Well, i haven't felt like that in so long.

When it was just you, and me. (:

Talking to Mistika just gives me so many flashbacks to primary school, and of course, we talked about how we met and how we hated each other, how we fought, how we laughed, our stupid mannerisms.

What we were at 9 compared to what we are now, compare it to what we'll be when we're 30. It's so different.

When we were 9 or 10, we were too busy caring about how bitchy those people were, how we hated teachers and hannah montana and HSM.

And now, we talk about boys, boyfriends, betrayers, how stupid we were crying over guys that weren't really worth it. Talk about us being fat, how our friends tend to not understand us, how the world seems to be turning too quick.

And then, when we're 30, we'll most prolly be married, with kids and a charming husband. And we'll maybe meet at 11pm at starbucks because we have to put our kids to sleep and drink coffee to keep us awake because we were too busy cleaning the house today. Talking about how naughty our kids are, how loud our husband snores, how irritating the stupid washing machine is and how our husbands complain how horrible the food is when we already tried our best.

Gr, i hate it when time flies so fastttt.

It sucks saying goodbye to mistika.

I rarely have these type of feelings when i go out with my other friends.

Sigh i guess she's really one in a million.

Haha, don't i always call you that. (:

It was really nice, and we didn't need to walk around that much or something.

I just like sitting down and enjoying the breeze and shade, not saying much and listening to her, talking about the most crazy things we did.

And of course, being the busybodies we are, we talked about how the other people in our primary school were doing. Haha, it's so funny, how news of others travel so quickly.

I don't know how to put it, it just feels so different with her around.

In a good way.

Ah i miss you mistika, i will always miss you when we're apart. D:

But i love living so near you.

Today was, relaxed. Very relaxed.

I love going sightseeing with her. :D

Yellow and Pink tissue papers! (:

Drinks from 7-11, picks from Davis.

Very crammed train rides.

Lots of stories from Misitika.

Attached people: alot of stories.

Single people: we just listen.

2009-10-17T13:06:00.000+08:00

Only time will tell.

2009-10-15T23:39:00.003+08:00

School was so unproductive today!

So was training.

Because i didn't do anything.

Hazel can massage well. I think.

She made the blue black on my toe go away. (ps, my toe is still swollen and pain!! D:)

"My god, i feel like i was in labour or something."

Haha, that was how pain it was.

Anyway, pain enough to keep me awake during the assembly talks on food and obesity.

anyway, i was busy ripping pictures off facebook and rearranging all the photos into different folders just now i totally forgot that i wanted to learn new songs on the guitar.

Tomorrow, is friday.

I should be shouting "THANK GOD ITS FRIDAY."

but then, there's training tomorrow.

Argh.

Okay i am tired, i will sleep.

Today was a very, very unproductive day.

Today i felt like doing something crazy, like kissing d on the cheek then run into the car. Haha.

Damn, he's getting hotter and nicer everytime i see him. Argh. Can't help it.

Cheryl Rena Cassie thinks i'm Bi, just cause i only liked a girl once.

Once.

And i'm bi?!

Tsk.

I'm straight.

thankyou and goodbye, i don't need you.

2009-10-15T07:55:00.002+08:00

fuck you, all you ever do is put me down. It's like rubbing salt on a fresh wound. You wanna know why i don't like being with you now? because i can't be myself, why? i get so much fuckload of rubbish of fucking dumbass comments from you. You think it's funny, you think those jokes are fucking funny. Well, they're not. Really.
I don't ever think you treat me as a proper friend, so why do i try to keep tolerating you and your so fucking funny jokes. you know sometimes, i'm in a bad mood and you start being a bitch and you go all "in your face", so fuck you. Thick skinned bitch. You're right, you're a bitch, a big one. Call me sensitive, whatever, i can't stand you anymore.

The glow-in-the-dark stars on the ceiling will start to glow.

2009-10-14T20:35:00.005+08:00

Today was very fun.
Why does time fly so fast, too fast i think.
Oh before i say anything, i just wanna say (okay no sense)

I figured maybe she's not the bitch, slut, pms, superficial asshole here y'know. Maybe it's you. And your lies. maybe she broke up with you cause of your lies. So i guess if it's true, and then hey, you're not worth it. Seriously not worth it. You should either learn how to lie even better or be true to the next person you fall for. Really, lying? "Because you have no choice." ? You have a choice to everything. Just, don't lie. Because you'll hurt the person alot when she finds out that you did and it'll hurt her even more when you say "you have no choice," so you lie. You hurt me, yes i admit, hurt me really bad and i didn't tell anyone what happened besides that you lied to me 3 times and i fell for it over again. And if you used the same tactics, i am stupid. Should have known. But it's okay, time will heal. and i think i'm getting better.

Yeah, you're a good friend to be with, great fun, loads of laughter. But know what, you're not a good lover. When it comes to truths, you supply the lies. And i guess i could be fine with it, because i've learnt my mistake from liking you. Liking you and your lies.

OKAY HI.
Today we went to watch 500 days of summer with Cheryl Cassie Emily Hazel YY.
I tell you, their scriptwriter is pure genius. PURE genius. It's so bloody nice, i cried. Hazel and YY too. I realised one of my quotes were from there. ( i shall go find it)

I like being on my own. Relationships are messy and people’s feelings get hurt. Who needs it? We’re young, we live in the one of the most beautiful cities in the world, we might as well have fun when we can, and save the serious stuff for later. — 500 Days of Summer

yay you summer, katy-perry look alike.
But tom (right?) so sad. Sigh.
there was a part i wanted to quote when he was at the bench when he met summer after she got married. Ah so sad. *deep breath* i cannot start crying.
Something about fate and destiny.
I will go google the script later hmmm.

Went to eat at waraku, what did we talk about. I forgot. I just realised i do this rubbing of hands thing then wiggle my fingers when my food arrives and when i'm hungry ready to attack my food. And most of the time, the people around me either give me that weird look or "YOU'RE A CHRISTIAN, YOU NEVER THANK GOD FOR THE FOOD?!?!??!" like so major whooha. then i go "Thankyou God for the food, AMEN!" *rubs hands again* Then they go, "THAT'S YOUR PRAYER?!". I proudly go," YES. :D"
Haha, it's funny when you see their expressions cause they expect you to go all solemn and holy when you thank god for the food, then pray for the poor children who doesn't have food in Africa, bless us with good nutrition, no constipation wtv. -_-

Okay i was digressing.
Then later they bought snacks.
Came to my place, emily just used my laptop.
The rest all modelled.
SO SEXY.
I am not allowed to post the pictures up here, but you should go to our blogshop.
:D
Hazel's and mine.
Yeap.

So retarded, but they're all so pretty.
D:
i jealous. HAHA.

My bed is scarred for life, YY felt horny on my bed -_-
Oh and 6 people on my bed, and the bed didn't break.
the phenomenon.
Ate chips, then cas and emily tried on dresses, so sexy. HAH.
Then cheryl emily cassie left.
Hazel YY and me.
Put YY (when she's horny) and Hazel together, it's not good.
shudders.
then hazel left.
YY and me.
Camwhored, omg YY so cute when she had long hair.

Then came gay porn les porn manga porn ARGH.

Oh yes, i hate my toe.
It's with a mega blue black and swollen till it looks like it's a deformed toe or something, it's pissing. There's training tomorrow.
I am supposed to complete my chinese homework by today.
Because-
there's chinese tuition tomorrow. CRIES.
I h8 my life, luv my friends.
:D

90210 tonight?
maybe.

Wait i frogot, there's school tomorrow. Why do i feel like holidays have already started.
AH MY TOE IS IRRITATING ME. i swear it looks fucking deformed.

K YY, here's the pics we took from my AWESOME SHITZO MAC. :D

And when you wake up on your own, you'll find that i'm already gone.

So maybe we should start all over, start all over again.

2009-10-13T20:20:00.004+08:00

I never knew i could find Emily's signature move.

And bam, i found it.

Her constant whacking of boobs. argh.

EXAMS ARE OVERRRRRRRR.

doesn't feel like it.

i still have tuition work to complete. ARGHHH Q@$#%@$%&. teacher's a bitch.

Went out like mad today.

Went home, with cas and em.

Hazel's fight to stay in the bus with Jodie was rather epic.

Rushed to change. Was practically FORCED to wear what i wore.

Okay went back to school cause em forgot to pass the math set to shab.

Met Jodie and Hazel at bugis.

NEVER EVER BUY GEOX FEATHERS SHOES I SWEAR.

bites like fuck.

damn irritating.

Walked to Haji Lane.

It was boring, cause almost all the shops were like closed.

But it's a great place to take pictures.

Haha, we found this shop that's called "soon lee". COOL RIGHT.

Cassie looks.. interested.

Then after that, went to shop at bugis.
Got stuck at the staircase thingy.
Went to cotton on, bought a tank and slippers cause the bloody shoes were killing me.
Went to orchard.
Ion.
Walked.
Hazel bought a tanktop.
:D
she looks so sex.
Went to rubi, BOUGHT FLATS HEH HEH I AM HAPPY CAUSE THEY HAVE MY SIZE :D
my stupid blueblack on my toe was hurting like fuck.
Thanks CASSIE AND EMILY FOR INFLICTING EVEN MORE PAIN ON IT.
at heeren.
we ate and orchard cineleisure.
Went to heeren.
Sat down, talked.

Hazel and i are gonna have a blogshop, selling all the shitz that we can't wear or don't want.
I literally have a pile of clothes on the floor for the sexy models to wear tomorrow.
Cheryl Cassie Emily Hazel.
After watching 500 days of summer!
:D
Can't wait can't wait.

I hate you, stupid blueblack on my toe. D:
Lesson to learn: never ever sleep on my parents' bed. OR. never run to eat after waking up.

"Someday" is on repeat on itunes.
Irritating me.
HANNAH MONTANA TIME.

minds are racing, hearts are beating.

2009-10-12T13:58:00.002+08:00

Science paper done, i think it's the worst paper i've done.

I slept too late last night i was half awake during my paper. D:

i am sad.

I need my comfort food.

I am going to grow fat.

I am going to sleep soon, later chinese tuition till 10. ARGH.

Hannah montana, i am going to watch now. :D

heh heh, she cheers me up.

Animal league, i miss you.

2009-10-11T23:00:00.003+08:00

I miss you too much for much too long my two babies, fei zai and lucky.

So, i am going to visit you on Sunday and most probably give you two a huge hug and start talking to you like you can actually understand how i feel and comb your fur and give you treats.

Ah i miss them so much, aren't they adorable.

Because i love you.

2009-10-11T22:46:00.004+08:00

Yeah i hope so.

Where are all the quotes to calm the soul!!

argh.

Thank you Aishyn & Z & X for the comforting.

TIME TIME TIME TIME TIME.

ASS ASS ASS ASS ASS.

ha.

I will get over it, with aishyn, SBF yo.

i'm sorry for ranting at you last night, A & Z. D: no one i could go to.

Thanks X for asking. (:

Science paper tomorrow.

I am scared.

Rawr.

I am hoping a B3..? that'll make me happy enough.

Haven't talked to ryan in sucha long time! (NOT PHUANINA BTW.)

miss him so much though i see him every week. (:

My weekends were.. unproductive with lots and lots of comfort food (as Zac calls it) and lots and lots of tears, lots and lots of hannah montana and jonas.

Ah i love them, its funny cause it's lame. We should all learn to be lame.

I just realised, i fall for guys who has brown eyes.

Argh, because i like brown eyes.

(HAHA TO Z'S STATEMENT OF HIM HAVING BROWN EYES THOUGH HE'S ASAIN LAST NIGHT.)

Hannah montana ftw!

If you don't like her and jonas, you're just in plain denial.

Yeah miley cyrus may be a slut whore bitch, wtv and JoBro may be players assholes fugly hairy, wtv.

but you've got to admit it, it's funny and worth the watch.

Why am i ranting about hannah montana and Jonas.

i am going crazy.

QUOTES QUOTES QUOTES.

"Good relationships balance over time. This means that at any particular point in time, the relationship may appear quite unbalanced: One partner may be more nurturing; one may be more needy; one may be providing all the financial support, etc. But if both partners are loving, understanding, giving, dedicated and flexible, then the relationship can handle all kinds of ups and downs, and still be strong, exciting and, yes, romantic. The best relationships are well balanced. Not a delicate balance; not a static balance- but a dynamic ever-changing balance."

Hope you learn from your mistake and hopefully the next person you like won't get hurt the way i did.

Forget about love.

2009-10-10T22:54:00.001+08:00

haha, this is really stupid. I am thinking of going gay for awhile.

Any objections?

yes?

Fuck you.

Could have loved you all my life if you didn't leave me waiting in the cold.

2009-10-10T22:37:00.002+08:00

I mean literally.

Now when people ask me what happened, i don't even dare to tell them, afraid that they'll laugh at my stupidity for falling for it thrice.

I HATE YOU BRYAN KEEFE CRESSWELL YOU HURT ME SO BAD.

Don't you worry, it's just a phase you're going through.

2009-10-10T16:17:00.001+08:00

I figured,
I hate you. But I'll lie the same way you do to me.
It's on.

I know I have a heart because I, can feel it breaking.

2009-10-10T16:02:00.000+08:00

If anyone asks, I'll tell them we both grew apart.
Is this what it really feels like to really cry.

I need a lot of hugs. When i say hugs, it's proper hugs.
I think I need to run to the toilet now and start crying.
Ah hannah Montana and Jonas where are you when I need you to cheer me up so badly. And it isn't really helping when your iPod decides to emo along with you.

Your lips were much too shy.

2009-10-10T15:47:00.004+08:00

I am trying convince myself that I actually want to come out to study. Want to look like a loner. And I'm trying to not think that I've been cheated of again. AGAIN. Arghhhhhhhhh.
I am very fustrated.
and the couple all lovey dovey on my right isn't really helping. It's like rubbing more salt on the wound I have already.
Fuck you okay.

My study date was cancelled cause I woke up late haha d, never mind you owe me an outing and a hug.

Went for lunch with parents at raffles town club, then went home. You sounded so sure you told me you pushed everything so that you'll be free in the afternoon and I was so stupid enough to believe again. Why do I keep beliving when you don't even tell the truth half the time.
Ah feel my pain okay, even though it's rather uexpainable now.

Okay so I'm at subway alone now at kallang leisure park, eating cookies hoping that they'll cheer me up.
):
imma very sad now.

2009-10-10T03:33:00.002+08:00

Is anyone awake. I feel like going for a super early jog.

I just felt motivated by disney shows AGAIN.

seriously, what do they do to make you feel this way. Rawr.

I watched Jonas. Damn funny. Or i have just gotten lamer.

"Follow your dreams"

So cliche from disney shows.

But why do i keep believing it whenever i keep watching it. Ah manipulative.

Hah.

Okay never mind i don't think i make any sense. I am going to sleep.

We'll make it happen, like sparks in the sky.

2009-10-10T02:44:00.003+08:00

"Because you're cute, funny, smart and i'm a total sucker for brown eyes. And i'm sorry for being judgmental about you being shorter than me and all, but i'm hoping you'd give me another chance." - Hannah Montana.

I'm sorry i'm spending my time watching Hannah Montana, but sometimes their jokes are really funny. Is it me or Hannah Montana has gotten real funny and corny at 2.46am in the morning. Okay off i go watching hannah montana. Maybe later Jonas heh heh.

It's just you, me, and the countless stars in the skies.

2009-10-10T01:33:00.003+08:00

Did i tell how much i love stars and how shitty i feel now.

I think i should go sleep but i can't get enough of short stories on the net which makes me feel like crying.

It's so amazing that you can feel so sad and down, but at the end of the day the people whom we so desperately want to be with now will most prolly not be the one you're actually going to marry and have kids with. And even when you know that, you still want to risk everything you've got. just to be with the person that you'll never actually spend your whole life with.

Because we don't save up all our love for our future husband / wives, we use some of them along the way, so who gives a fuck even if this doesn't last long.

Makes sense?

People always dream of wanting things that we can't have and aren't contented with the things they already have.

From the cliche phrase: Man is always greedy.

And the simple example is that i think i have shitty wavy hair and i hate it to the max, and i am absolutely in love with people having straight hair. Whereas people like hazel, who has straight hair, wants and loves wavy hair and hates her straight hair. Get my point, we always want things that we cannot get.

Does that apply to love too? We always, or most of the time, we want the people that we can't really get.

Because maybe he doesn't love you the way you thought he did. Maybe it was a facade.

You know i especially hate it when people try to talk big with me or let's try to put it in a simpler way: they just bullshit alot to you, taking you as an idiot. Yes, they take you as an idiot, when you're not. Okay. Maybe you are because maybe you're just so in love with him you know that maybe he's bullshitting his ass away but you still want to believe him even though your friends tell you he's not worth it, not worth the tears, not worth all this hurting, cause see? you're not even with him so why hurt.

but i still hate people who bullshit.

Do i make sense to you at 140am.

I hope i do.

And maybe someday, we'll figure this out.

2009-10-10T00:13:00.004+08:00

Today was so fun.

We finished our papers at 10plus, the green mob ( i mean us, 14 people) attacked macs. Kc took it first, so me rena emily hazel cassie pam esther elissa went to the outside to sit. I somehow felt like it was some family reunion like so fun and peaceful, where you can kinda be yourself. JJSN LAVELLE AND HYU ALL SAT INSIDE. priss.

Had so much fun at macs. Karma is real, laughed at elissa for spilling milo on her skirt, later i had milo on my skirt cause em made me laugh.

Emily has weird logics. Hamster, giraffe, cow and rats have no tails.

Then we made an impulsive decision and went to hazel's place to watch movies.

AHA.

Played with bob.

Omg we put him in this plastic ball thing and he looked lik

e a real life replica of that hamster in the ball in 'bolt'! haha so cute.

Watched the covenant AH SO HOT THE GUYS THERE. you know i think the plot sucks, but the guys are just tooo hot to miss. ARGH. even rena and hazel screamed when we saw them when they were in their trunks HAH.

"THEIR ABS ENGRAVED ONE AH" - EMILY.

HAHA

Oh yes chace crawford is the 4th dude, not the long hair one y'know. I googled it. :D AHAH. THATS WHY I TOLD YOU HE DOESNT LOOK LIKE CHACE!

when chace crawford is in a movie, everything can wait. we glue our eyes on the tv.

ARENT THEY HOT OMG I SWEAR THEIR MUSCLES WERE EVEN BIGGER IN THE MOVIE AH GODLIKE LA.

hehhhhh hehhhh.

Then after that, because hazel and emily are deprived people, they wanted to watch titanic.

but cheat one la, they forward to all the romantic parts also, haha.

Lesson to learn, never sit between hazel and rena, they tend to go very high when they see the hot guys (not saying i don't) but hazel goes on a kissing spree and there's rena to hold me down. Damn traumatizing. Rawr.

Hazel is a scandalous person.

We should get her like a porn book for her birthday or something.

Today was really fun, overall speaking.

Tuition was shitty. My teacher STILL hasn't gotten over my hair, gosh.

haha.

Went for swensens with cousins at 10pm.

Nothing much.

Tomorrow, study date. I think.

D, i need a hug. D:

Ohyeah all the girls watch this.

This dude is born with no hands and legs, i strongly encourage you all to watch the whole thing, seriously, he's really good. I just put up this part, go there to watch it, super encouraging, he can like speak right through you.

i cried. haha.

So take my hand,

2009-10-08T17:30:00.003+08:00

I LOVE YOU HAZEL LIM YOU SEXY BITCH.

you cannot beat nicole la, you can never take the picture like she did. (the eyes one)

Anyway, see i told you now i feel like xams are over when i know it's not argh.

I don't have tuition today, it will be on sunday 830pm, shit.

Saturday, study date. :D yes i finally can go out i am happy i think i will get free food from that person haha.

plot & characters for animal farm.

Oh thanks Sungho for the notes on history, really helped alot love you.

Twin i miss you, we need to talk!!

Aishyn, SBF! ARGH WE NEED TO TALK SO BADLY AND WE NEED MAJOR RANTING SESSIONS AND CRAZY TRY-OUT CLOTHES SESSION.

Mistika, we neeeed to go out, we've been saying this since last year man! Miss you like shitz, anyone bully you, you tell me. i ask them go fuck themselves k.

need to catch up with these people majorly. like major.

My brother is the smartest poop on the earth.

He had his chinese compo.

He only knew one guy name for the character.

And his dilemma, there were 2 guys in the compo.

So he named one "小明" and cause he didn't know anymore guy names, he named the other dude...

"小丽" omg la, that's a bloody girls' name!

And i was laughing and laughing and i asked him, why didn't you just put your name in there!

"Oh i forgot."

Acs chinese fail.

HAHAH.

Okay i am going to study, or not.

Hope that gave you a good laugh, cause it sure made me crack up.

2009-10-08T00:05:00.001+08:00

OH MY GOD NOOBS OF THE YEAR.

(if you can't recognize these super-cool people, left to right:

Cassie, Me, Nicole, Hazel)

i am happy history finally got into my brains.

So tell me what you want, what you really really want.

2009-10-07T23:42:00.001+08:00

"I want to give my self to someone entirely, leave my kisses all over their face, give silly love songs to, lose my hand in theirs, trace their body with my fingertips, lose myself in their eyes. I want to fight over pointless things just to make up ten minutes later and laugh because we know we trust each other. I want to be forgiven for my past mistakes and settle down. I want to try… even if I just get crushed I know I would have done this one thing right. And that really is so important. It took some time but I finally feel like I can appreciate someone. Fully. I’ve opened the cage to welcome the butterflies back I guess all I can do now is wait."

Pretty girls with plastic smiles and cold hearts.

2009-10-07T21:53:00.002+08:00

I just realised i need a hug so badly.
I haven't had one in quite sometime.
Suddenly i have this very weird image of all my friends coming to hug me ha ha this is retarded.
"Stay my baby" (Is that the song title!) by Miranda is playing on Nickelodeon.

I think no one would read this till after doomsday (which is tomorrow).
Everyone should be mugging.
unlike me.
Sigh.
I'm nocturnal anyway.
:D

Apparently i had a epic nap during art in the com lab today.
Sel & Shalini were laughing their butts off cause uhm, apparently-
i was sleeptalking/ mumbling. And they couldn't wake me up, though the whole class knows that already. (understatement of the year)
So yeah, but i even had a dream. Woah, i slept deep.

I like reading quotes, they're better than story books.
especially eletheowl. :D

Saw JessicaTaye today haha, she's STILL so pretty and STILL so jealous of my teeth.
HAHA, ily jessica!
:D

Uhm, finally got to meet the wonderful author of the awesome comic series on hazel.
Yiyun.
Haha.
HAZEL YOU GOT YOUR FACTS ALL SCREWED UP LA. AIYO.

okay there's nothing left to say.
i think i am going half mad trying to handle everything.
No, i am going mad.
History and math tomorrow.
I think i am very sure that i will start jumping and going all high after the two papers.
And i'm quite sure i'll feel like exams are over but hoho, no.
It ends on the 13th.
And i have a study date on saturday, whoo.
Science.

Okay i need to stop typing
I need to read the answers on asknlearn.
Seeya tomorrow.

Oh, a quote to finish it off.
Today is one of THOSE days i feel like ignoring you and hating you for the rest of my life.

"Everyone’s heartbroken nowadays, but I mean, we all just gotta move on. What’s the point of reminiscing when you know the person is no longer worth while; when they’re no longer who they used to be? When their heart is somewhere else? Do you think they still care for you, still sit there thinking about you? Because frankly, they don’t."

Yeah, you don't.

For you to read and for the heart to hear.

2009-10-06T18:25:00.002+08:00

" Why do I care so much about you, after all you’ve done to me? I mean, you’re nothing really special, just another stupid teenage idiot. But you were always my idiot, and that’s what counts. God, I used to believe in you. I really did. But I don’t know what to believe anymore. You blew it, idiot. I hope you’re happy. Just when I thought everything would be okay, you threw it all away. You changed before my eyes. It’s like these last months meant nothing. I’m not gonna lie, this hurts like hell. I’ve never hurt this much over another person. I want to be done with you. But I can’t say goodbye. This might seem backwards, but I don’t know what hurts more right now, the possibility that you never cared about me at all, or the possibility that you still do. "

It's amazing to know how quotes can speak right through you, gosh.

2009-10-06T12:49:00.002+08:00

I know it doesn't hurt anymore when I say I hate you cause I know you don't care. But seriously you've chnaged so much after the holidays. It's like there nothing left to talk about then you try to fit youself in not actually caring about other people's feelings. So I'm going to say it again and I hope it gets into you.

I hate you,L.

Respond

2009-10-06T08:24:00.003+08:00

Today feels like some emo day cause it was raining.
Hillsongs is just making things worse, shit I should have put owl city in here, but I don't have the chance to put it in cause I can't use the com. Argh. Sungho is nice, thanks dude (:

last night was shit. Why can't you be like others, you always think that I should follow you, get things the hard way. Well I'm sorry that I am the oldest and I should be slogging my guts out just to have money to spend, and that when people talk about how they have money, I can't say anything, and when people talk about going shopping with their parents, I can't say anything as well. Know why? Cause you don't pay, we window shop. You make me go to other people when I want things, and you call me greedy. What do you want me to do when none of you are willing to open your big fat wallets.

On the other hand, you're an attention seeker.
I'll just take it that you are unloved, unwanted and you don't have the spotlight on you at home so you're just talking and doing all this shitload of rubbish to get people's attention.
Pathetic.

thanks for last night. Idk what you have in you, you just leave me speechless. You can be so retarded, but then again, you can say the things I like to hear or say the right things at the right time, which just makes me feel special and want to snuggle up with you. But then again, you can be so ignorant at times and makes me so pissed I feel like ignoring you for the rest of my life. And then again, maybe I should be your ex girlfriend because at least you spam her with messages and call her and whatever when she ignores you. So yes, it feels so confusing when I talk to you. So I don't know how to feel.

We will be alright.
Bye fuckers, h8 u.

Keep on thinking this is how it ought to be.

2009-10-05T10:18:00.004+08:00

Teachers are especially nice when it's exams period, really.
iPods allowed. See what I mean.

Anyway, dinner with the family last night at some high end restaraunt last night, but with a tired jiejie, a very bimbotic little brother (due to the major influence of his sister) and, me in a dress with sneakers-
well we could tear the whole place down.
Did I tell you my brother watches too much tv he actually acts out advertisements. It's much more interesting than the tv. And confessed that he only knows girl songs. He can really pass off as a younger sister, seriously. Why did god make him a boy ):

camwhored. Went super high, and I think we cheered those grumpy adults up with our lame jokes. Yay us.
I figured-
bimboticness just runs in the blood.
I'll be the bung and you'll be the bimbo,
it's a love story, jiejie just say yes.
Luv you jiejie.

Recess now,toodles.

So much more.

2009-10-03T18:09:00.004+08:00

Firstly, i am sad cause nike human race is CLOSED. damn, i've been waiting since last year. Guess i will have to wait another year. D:

Okay, secondly, (if you want to skip the useless rantings of a "lovestruck for 1-2 weeks" girl, skip this part)

FAME IS AWESOME.

I AM GOING TO LIKE RANT ALL OF IT HERE.

Hot guys:

ASHER BOOK

PS. Asher Book is 21, and his birthday (oh how coincidental) is on the 18th september. *faints*

Lead singer of V Factory too (never heard of them though)

PAUL MCGILL AHHH SO HOT SO HOT SO HOT SO HOT.

Paul McGill's a damn bloody good dancer and damn handsome and i love his hair (in the movie).

AHHHH.

I googled him and apparently he's on broadways. Hmm, and his voice is quite.. gay.

BUT HE IS SO SEXY. :D

HAHA. Keri Payne is in the movie too, and she dances so bloody well. DUH she's from so you think you can dance. -_- and she's 19. WOAH.

There are hot girls in there too, but i'm just lazy to post.

Well, yeah enjoy.

I've got better days.

2009-10-02T18:13:00.003+08:00

I've got a letter i would like to send,

it's lacking strings of words punctuation at the end.

Should i trust dialect to convey the right effect?

I've got somethings i would like to set in pen,

I would have used a pencil, but lead's just not permanent.

All of us just want some attention,

she thinks she has it all,

but she has nothing.

WHY DO WE HAVE 365 DAYS IN THE YEAR.

2009-10-02T18:05:00.003+08:00

She said, "I've got to be honest,

You're wasting your time if you're fishin' around here."

And I said, "You must be mistaken,

I'm not foolin', this feelin' is real."

She said, "You've gotta be crazy!

What do you take me for? Some kinda of easy mark?"

Because it seems almost impossible when i weigh the consequences of doing the things i would want to do with you.

You have the brightest smile in the universe, and if i could dim the lights in the hallway i would, for you.

Well you are the one, the one who lies close to me.

Whispers "Hello I miss you quite terribly."

I fell in love, in love with you so suddenly.

Now there's no place else i could be but here in your arms.

She looks up to the sky,

asks God why,

and stares at the phone, her insides screaming, demanding that the phone would ring and hoping, wishing that the caller ID would have your name on it.

And no, the phone that she holds now is clear evidence that silence is not fucking golden.

When you don't know where to go, run.

2009-10-02T17:55:00.002+08:00

Don't we all wish we could go back when we were at the magical, wonderful age of 4.

Zero down the possibilities of getting with you.

Right, zero.

Exams sux.

2 1/2 papers down. Go go go.

I like reading people's sophisticated blogs, makes me inspired. Really, and it keeps me constantly checking the dictionary (thank god mac has one) to actually understand what they say. I want to be cheem. Haha.

Inspirations please.

2009-09-30T20:56:00.003+08:00

Idk why i am blogging so much and the previous post was the most edited ones ever so wtv manz.
I am in no mood to study oh in 4 minutes i will go and watch the 9m channel 8 show this is just great there's english paper tomorrow and i'm still going to glue my eyes on the tv for one hour.

1. I actually stilllike you.
2. I was lying about being okay.
3. I lie alot, don't trust me.
4. Please come back.
5. I miss you.
6. Sometimes, i think i don't know you anymore.
7. See, i told myself not to believe so much, where was the call at 11 last night. HAH.
8. You were so yesterday.
9. Get off my back.
10. I think friends are really always there for you ready to catch you if you fall.
11. So i guess you're not a true friend, though you thought you were?
12. Never mind, i'll save up all my love for someone who actually cares and who actually dares to take risks.
13. I like the way you laugh.
14. Enjoy your birthday old poop.
15. I am v v tired of this life, i want a runaway plan.
16. Friends, where are you when i need you.
17. Sleepless nights.
18. Loud.
19. Shut up.
20. stop screaming in my head, i know it's still there, but we have to forget.
21. I hate you, so so much i want to keel you.

1day. escape.

2009-09-30T20:27:00.005+08:00

BREAK LOSE, BREAK FREE.
We gotta run, to the fastest we can.
If you take my hand now, i'll show you something new.

I figured something, i can write pretty nice songs,
BUT.
i don't WRITE them, i just sing it out with some random tune but when i want to write down the lyrics and chords, i just forget them all.
HA HA.
Whatever, at least i sing out my sorrows instead of you know what.

DID YOU FEEL SINGAPORE SHAKE TODAY!
omg, apparently there's going to be a tsunami hitting Indonesia again. ):
I thought i was having a headache when it was shaking cause i was having tuition, only after my tutor asked me if i felt the shake i said yeah, he said he thought he was crazy. HAHAHA.
had a good laugh and a good time with all the suans from my tutor.
NVM JASON, I WILL STILL LOVE YOU AND YOUR TUMMY CAUSE YOU GAVE ME SOME AWESOME PLASTIC THINGY WHICH IS 1000000 TIMES BETTER THAN THAT BENDY THING TO DRAW GRAPHS WITH. YOU KEWL.

English exam tomorrow.
i get to go home at 930. yipee.
geog geog geog.
I have chinese tuition tomorrow, so extra!
TSK.

Darryl Chua WL is nice.
YOU SO AWESOME LA DARRYL haha.
you know what you said on monday was quite corny, but!
it was still sweet.
haha.

I think i study too hard for history but i still don't get the marks i want. DAMN.
Even Mrs Chua can feel my pain oh btw have a safe delivery mrs chua we will miss you.
Next history teacher in line: Mrs Fong (jamie's grumpy old grandmama.)

I cannot remember the series of events that took place today.
my memory is failing me.
ARGH.

Zac is the only one that thinks my chunky posts with bolded letters weren't cool. D:
And he hates taylor swift , says that her songs are always about her getting dumped and not getting the guy she wants and he says that he'll bet that the next album would come out with more breakup/ heartbreak songs. (FYI THEY MEAN ALOT TO ME AND FYI IT DOESN'T MEAN I GET DUMPED ALOT OR NOT GETTING THE GUY I WANT ALOT OKAY. okay maybe the second one counts, BUT!)
and likes to call me a bimbo. He says my english sarks. Hey it isn't easy trying to make out new sentences from sentences that has zero link kay. AND it makes sense, to me at least.
But wtv, i still love you for reading it.

Oh i got new ipod speakers, i am happy.
Oh Darryl's older sister knows Yiying.
WHY IS THE WORLD SO FUCKING SMALL.
SIGH.

I ought to start studying.
Note to self: no "shouln't couln't wouldn't" tomorrow for essay please!

STAY SANE, I AM NOT GOING TO SAY I AM ON A HIATUS, BUT I WILL TRY MY BEST TO KEEP AWAY FROM MY MUM'S ROOM (my laptop's current home).
And people/poops, my tagboard is dead. which means all the silent readers out there, keep it alive.
:D

Luv you.

Clocks are ticking, minds unweaving

2009-09-30T07:54:00.002+08:00

Itouch is awesome. I have yet to post a draft heh heh.

When you're 14, you're entitled to do crazy things.
Does that include liking someone you didn't thought you would.
Why, of course, if you could get carlsberg on valentine's in broad daylight as a dare and not get caught-
what's the harm of liking someone you're not supposed to?

Oh right, I fall too easily too hard.

Exams tomorrow. Children's day. Someone's birthday.

LIES, EMPTY HOPES, BROKEN PROMISES.

2009-09-28T23:17:00.003+08:00

SORRY I WANTED TO POST THIS UP EONS AGO.

I never keep up to my word when i say i am going on a hiatus. Seriously, i think it was like a million posts ago when i declared i would go on a hiatus and look where i am now.

~~Do you know it feels like when a person makes a promise and then breaks it.~~
YES I DO.

~~And when he most probably won't come, he still gives you that tint of hope saying he would at midnight.~~

Yes, i confess, it made me feel special for a second when you told me oh, you're gonna meet me and we're gonna talk it out. It sounded like we were going to fix this, once and for all, for real. I told myself not to believe so much, and not to hope so much because if it didn't turn out the way i thought it would be, i'd fall hard. And in the end, you are not the one hurting, i am. But yet, i refused to listen to myself and when the clock hit 10, i kept giving myself excuses after excuses and still hoping you would come. And when you told me you are still out, i laughed at my stupidity for believing it might actually come true, that whole scene i thought it would turn out to be, would actually come true, but it didn't. And yet, i stayed up till 12, watching the tv and constantly checking my phone for a message or an apology but nothing came up, only the random messages i got from other people. Then i decided to sleep, 1254 you messaged. I woke up at 5am to read the message, M & E were right. No, no, doesn't mean you're in the wrong, and doesn't mean that by posting this, it meant that i wish i never met you.

It just doesn't feel right anymore, and it doesn't feel the same.

I missed it, yes.

But i guess things change, so i guess i'm gonna suck up to it.

Everything's okay now, shitz.

New hairstyle, anyway.

Oh yes, whatever okay, i don't care if i receive any comments about my hair.

Say it sucks, it rocks, whatever.

I JUST NEEDED A DRASTIC CHANGE OKAY.
I needed to be different, i needed to get over some stuff and change, so i just thought a change in hairstyle would like symbolize a change, i guess. ARGH I KNOW YOU WON'T UNDERSTAND.
I am NOT going bung.
(though i know i am luving the comments of me looking like a dude muahah.)
so fuck okay.
My hair will grow.

I learnt something really..
new & freaky in church on sunday:

When you curse, you curse 4 generations down.
So uhm, i have no idea how many generations have been BESTOWED with my curse, but-
sorry manz.

You are my only one.

2009-09-25T18:55:00.002+08:00

YOU ARE MY ONLY ONE TOO, BABE. (:

rawr rawr I AM SUPPOSED TO BE STUDYING.
okay i have been ever since i reached home.
the only reason why i touched the laptop was because my mother demanded i edit some things on her bloody ad on mocca.
She's selling all the golfballs stacked up in our house.
yes, praise the lord.

Did i tell you my mum is weird.
No, weirder these days i mean.
Like, she screamed her head off at me when i busted my phone bill.
and then 5 mins later, she comes to me and says, "Rachel, be a good girl okay? mummy loves you."
And that day, i was highly convinced it has something got to do with that headache she had.
But today proved me wrong.

(FOR THE RECORD, I JUST GOT GROUNDED. FOR COMING HOME LATE. EVEN THOUGH I WASN'T TOLD WHAT TIME I WAS SUPPOSED TO BE HOME.)

I was on the bus going home, mum called.
she screamed at me asking me where i am.
scream scream scream and then she screamed-asked me if i had keys to the house.
then when i reached home, she called me and said "Girl, must study hard kay. exams are coming."
Is my mum menopausing at such an early age. I don't really know.

But yeah, i am grounded.
For coming home late and for having lunch for 2 hours is not acceptable for my mum.
So i'm grounded.
High five Jodie, you're not alone.

Okay so this is where i say goodbye till eoys are out of my life.
(:
Take care and stay sane, yo.
we'll all try to keep our heads in place.

ILY BABE.

You are the superstarz.

2009-09-24T16:59:00.002+08:00

boy this is awkward.

these few days, pamela steals my phone and messages practically everyone in my contacts list. thank god i have unlimited. :/

i am supposed to be doing chinese.

idk why i am here.

pamela you owe me.

I will love you forever and ever till the day i die.

X & I were supposed to post up the same songs. but idk what song you're gonna post so wtv.

i'm posting first.

WAIT. WHAT DAY WAS THE DAY WE GOT TGTH.

HAHAHA.

I can't wait for saturday, actually.

430pm, haircut.

I am prepared.

with 8 pictures of the hairstyle i want.

the dude better not screw it up.

Sunday.. animal league or not?

Sigh.

EXAMSAREIN7FUCKINGDAYSFUCKTHISSHIT.

kayz, never mind, as long as i have X it'll be fine.

Angel of mercy how did you find me, how did you pick me up again.

I don’t know but
I think I maybe
Fallin’ for you
Dropping so quickly

I want to
I’m scared of what you’ll say
But I’m tired of
Holding this inside my head

I’ve been spending all my time
Just thinking about ya
I don’t know what to do
I think I’m fallin’ for you
I’ve been waiting all my life
and now I found ya
I don’t know what to do
I think I’m fallin’ for you
I’m fallin’ for you

As I’m standing here
And you hold my hand
Pull me towards you
And we start to dance
All around us
I see nobody
Here in silence
It’s just you and me

You made my day, love.

I didn't say half the things i wanted to.

2009-09-23T15:43:00.003+08:00

Exams are coming, i just realised. Wake up call please. I should start studying. I am going to do home econs now, why am i still here. Been there, done that. I should go die. Geography paper is next friday. I accidentally typed "friday" as friends. Something is wrong with me. I think last night went fine, very fine, without you. I can always find another person to talk to. I am glad today was fun, and that i didn't think of you for a second. I actually laugh at myself for being so addicted to you last time. I don't know about you, but i find it funny. I am sorry i am not leaving any lines now, because i just have a very very long chain of thoughts + lyrics. I almost got killed today by some metal pipe thing some idiot threw and he didn't see me. I am going to memorize chinese things today after home econs. Time is running out. Quick. Escape routes. No where to run to. What am i to do. All this time i was wasting hoping that you would come around. I've been giving out chances but all you do is run me down. And it's taking me this long, but baby i figured you out. You think it might be fine again, but not this time around. Disappointed. Forget. You, shut up. We'll get back at you. Stop hurting. I won't believe you like i did before. You're not sorry. She is yours. Looking so innocent i might believe you if i didn't know. Could have loved you all my life if you haven't left me in the cold. Now you've got your fair share of secrets and i'm sick of being last to know. And now you're asking me to listen because it's worked each time before. So sick of love songs, so tired of tears. So sick of wishing you were still here. Why are people always leaving i think you and i should stay the same. I didn't mean to. Are you happy now. Get off my back. It's not your fault. This is the last straw, there's nothing left to beg for. You can tell me that you're sorry but i don't believe you baby like i did before. If you keep playing these games, we're both going to lose. She can have you. I think taylor swift is pretty witty when she puts secret codes in her songs. Forever and Always and You're not Sorry. It's great. Speak for yourself. I should stop calling people when i drink. I stare at the phone, he still hasn't called and then you feel so low you can't feel nothing at all. Cassie watches too much drama shows. You caused it. You can only blame your problems on my world for so long, before it all becomes the same old song. I should try doing what taylor swift does. But not letters, words. haha. Maybe i should. I think i will. Eat my dust ha. I wanna scream i love you from the top of my lungs, but i'm afraid somebody might hear me. Get out. Leave. It's the end of you and me. People come and go, let's face it. Stop playing. Get up. Get over yourself. Guess you weren't what i thought you'd be. I thought you were nice. I thought we were friends. Secrets. Us. They. This is a long post. Or at least looks like. I hope this strained your eyes if you bothered to read. I am going to be happy because i deserve to. But then again, if you asked me if i loved him, i'd lie. stop lying. Quit it. Leave me alone. All this time, i've been wasting.You've got plenty of time to think. You should be happy. Failure. When a friendship is on it's rocks, doesn't mean it has to end. Bu gan yuan. You were right. Paranoid. Happy. That's what you get when you let your heart win. This feels WRONG. because it is.

I thought it was rather cool.

2009-09-22T16:08:00.003+08:00

My mother is a mother fucker.

busted my bill.

never gonna call ever again.

I hate iris bus service.

FUCK.

Here's to your temper.

2009-09-22T12:27:00.003+08:00

20.09.2009 was a very fun day.
Church was.
mundane.
I am getting bored of church, i need church camp to come soon.
Christelle wrote me a very very nice letter! (:

went to meet em and rena and plaza sing,
ate, bitched, secrets, yougurt, saw uncle and cousin.
then we went on to talk about us marrying each other's cousins or brothers or wtv.
WEIRD LA.
haha.
then took the mrt.

EMILY OWNS AT DJ MAx, SRSLY.
lvl 3 songs and she dies.
sarah ting sucks, didn't go to animal league. :/

I can't wait till eoys are over then go know.
I miss all the dogs there.
I MISS LUCKY.
i miss ernie, i miss fei zai, i miss fei ba, i miss mimi, i miss jammer, i miss gigi, i miss ricky, i miss lucky lim (okay not really, he's scary), i miss "menopausing doggy that barks when everyone makes so much noise" cause i think he's rather cool, i miss scooby, i miss john (or johnny ah? the 3 legged one), i miss pirate. i miss all the dogs! D:

we helped to clean the kennels and we found sarah's good friend and mine-
ERNIE.

because ernie is a vegetarian too!
he ate grass while watching us with (much) amazement when we were cleaning the kennels.
And he hates red pails, he was in this really epic fight with rena for the red pail and emily was so scared when she was all the way at the kennel and it was taking place at the small pool, and guess who lost-

RENA.
HAHHAHA.

anyway ernie is my good friend too cause he's a very good swimmer
and he likes water splashes.
so i like ernie

LUCKY IS THE BEST LA SO CUTE.
feizai also.
lucky bit me, D: but it was a play bite.
my gosh, the owner of lucky sucks.
he was abandoned at a void deck.
that idiot should go die.

:/

and then there are alot of other sad stories.
D:

we should all go there and show those dogs some love! haha.
then after cleaning the kennels, went to mingle around with the dogs.
Rena and emily liked all the dogs i didn't like.
Like lucky lim, LUCKY LIM IS SCARY.
but the only thing i find funny/ poor thing about him is that he's kinda racist.
cause they said his previous owner maybe indian then they abused him, so that day there was an indian that came in and he started barking non stop and he looked scared. so poor thing.
RICKY IS A BIG BIG DOG AND I AM SCARED OF HIM.

i think the only reason why i didn't really like it on sunday was because when i first walked in, all the dogs were smelling my ass. -_-
note to self/ everyone: never go there when you're having your period, unless you totally don't mind dogs coming to you and sniffing your ass that's fine.

finished cip then went to white sands for dinner with emily and rena.
secrets again.
haha.
subway. :D
emily's parents fetched us home.
it's funny when you see emily and her sister fight. (:

i wanna go back to animal league! damn.

i don't think i can blog alot nowadays, gotta study.
i am blogging in school btw so yes, it's a rather long post.

Yesterday was just, boring.
woke up at 8am, to rush my chinese homework for chinese tuition, and i am very proud of myself cause i managed to memorize 2 paragraphs of the chopsticks poem in 15 min. :D
after tuition, ate lunch, slept till 3, woke up, studied history till 6. Dinner parkway, wasted my time cause i was supposed to get my ipod speakers but then it closed so yeah.
that was the day very, very well spent.
the night just, sucked. raspberry vodka tastes like cough medicine. sucks like shit. or maybe it's just me cause i was having a bad cough yesterday. :/
x, never get me that ever again.

I suck.
I went skipping today during recess, emily has my phone now and i have no idea where she is! _I_
200 double, 200 running, 50 left, 50 right, 200 running, 200 double.
I am recording this down to comfort myself.
and i will not remind myself that i ate wedges and a bottle of lemon tea that contained 16.8g of fats!
URGH.
gained back all the carbs in just minutes. ):

i need to study.
i feel like slapping myself because i get distracted so easily.
WHERE IS THE RACHEL IN T1.
i need her backkkkkk.
rawr.

You suck,
i suck,
they suck,
love sucks,
you suck you suck you suck you suck.

Hazel just said i was lame.
LOOK WHO IS SCRIBBLING ON PAINT LA. tsk stupid.
somemore scribbling "i love hazel" on paint. -_-
still laugh at me.

don't you know

2009-09-19T23:53:00.001+08:00

IF YOU ASKED ME IF I LOVED HIM, I'D LIE.

youtube cheers me up 2

2009-09-19T23:37:00.001+08:00

i swear to god i'm a sadist cause i was laughing like crap at this.

Awkward balloon ROCKS.

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH.

That i won't let go.

2009-09-19T20:14:00.002+08:00

Note to self: Rip pictures off facebook. I have yet to do that.

Am doing home economics now.

It's great to have a partner who spams you with 6 missed calls when you don't send her the file at 10pm last night. (:

Luv you Selina.

And deadline is : 9pm tonight.

shit.

Okay, today-

i finally had the balls to go cut my hair short, like bung short, the swish swish hair luh.

So yeah.

I didn't.

Why?

cause the hairdresser was too busy.

Made me wait there for 3 hours.

Wasted my time.

So now, where am i going to find the balls again?!

Shit la.

Okay so that was basically how my saturday was spent.

I suddenly have the thought that i should have my next haircut at some ulu place with a friend.

-i just thought of hazel-

haha.

Idk, maybe it'll work.

But to think positively, even IF my hair gets screwed, IT WILL GROW.

yes.

okay.

I need to do home ec now.

SIGH.

passing laptop to my mum thursday i think.

I just realised, i have a shitload of chinese homework to do.

CRAP.

Okay i need to complete it by tonight.

Sucks.

180909

2009-09-18T18:47:00.004+08:00

Today is a good good good day.

thank you to JJSNP for such an awesome surprise, and i am really really touched and grateful that i have such friends like you-

really caught me off guard.

I love you so so much.

Thank you to hyu, stacy, namrata, merryl, bb, JJSNP, rena, hazel, cassie, cheryl, iris, selina, shalini, bk, marcus, aishyn, sarah dahlberg, sarah ting, colette, qi an, drey, sally, zac, aaron, steph, ryan, arthur, yiu jun and everyone else who wished me happy birthday regardless how.

I am sorry if this is gonna get damn boring and naggy but i want to blog about this in detail then one day when i decide to read how my 14th birthday went, i'll remember it well.

haha.

Okay, so i went to school all excited.

I thought that cheryl, hazel, cassie, rena emily they all would do what they did last year, like all huddle up and sing the birthday song. But they didn't. haha.

Apparently, they were supposed to act like they forgot my birthday.

Haha.

anyway, assembly, christine, iris, selina, shalini, bavithra wished me.

Oh i forgot.

Last night.

First person to wish me was tiffany. she wished me at 10 plus. ahah.

then mistika. (before twelve though)

at twelve first person was AISHYN. (love you)

then bryan called. CHEAT MY FEELINGS, I THOUGHT YOU WENT TO SLEEP. haha.

anyway that was a nice surprise.

Then it was marcus's sms.

Then darryl called.

Then i can't remember...

I woke up with 7 messages.

and yeah.

okay anyway.

went back to class, somemore birthday wishes.

got hyu's letter and flower. Love it ttm.

So cute.

And then my clique gave me on plastic sheet. Best.

haha.

Stacy's really crazy letter!

and then after lit, class sang happy birthday haha.

Recess, i got a kiss from emily.

hugs from rena and birthday wishes from Sally and kavya.

Oh yes kavya gave me a present.

After school, went to collect CIP form, went with Pamela.

Then met the clique at the bus stop, and then went to macs.

Hazel let out her secret that she wanted to buy me a mega mcspicy meal and hot fudge sundae for my birthday present haha.

So i waited at macs, while the clique went to buy their food and i had to wait till she came.

When they got their food, they were explaining how great the plastic sheet they all gave me was.

"It is useful!"

"It's the only thing we could get, we had no time"

"seriously"

And then when she came, rena emily cassie were all there with her and they were holding this hugeass board thing with a million of my glam/ unglam pictures on one side and the other with hugeass words "HELLO I AM RACHEL TODAY IS MY BIRTHDAY" HAHAH.

i was like damn super shocked.

I almost wanted to cry.

And then came all the letters.

HAHA.

from cassie nicole and sam.

Super sweet luh!

And did i mention the name "RACHEL" was in Orange and pink.

AHA. they remembered my favourite colours.

heh heh heh.

altough 2 pictures were missing. D:

i was really really touched anyway. haha.

Aww.

and apparently, they all went to Jodie's place yesterday to do this whole thing.

AH I AM SUPER TOUCHED BEYOND WORDS KAYZ.

and then hazel bought me a mcspicy meal with hot fudge sundae and she even help me take the chilli and ketchup.

She was so sweet lah!

this has to be the best mcspicy meal ever and the best birthday surprise ever.

I think my clique is cool, they have like some real talent.

HOW THE HELL DID THEY MANAGE TO HIDE THE HUGEASS THING FROM ME THE WHOLE TIME.

my gosh.

or i was just too oblivious.

haha.

super happy. (:

then went to watch friendly match at CC.

quite okay, had fun with rena cassie hazel and em.

CC is scary, their toilets are clean though.

Watch them play.

woah, super rough.

Rena called it "WWE NOOB."

haha.

their coach is freaky. AHAH we all think he's attracted to cassie, i mean who wouldn't.

CBC.

hahah.

Watched, then went off, took bus home, everyone was staring at my board.

hahaha.

then walked home.

yes and here i am.

Going to get ready.

STEAK FOR DINNER TONIGHT BABY.

yeah yeah yeah.

I am a happy girl today.

18 shall be my lucky number.

Okay back after dinner.

I had the sudden urge to crash jodie's place.

My parents felt bad that my friends were so nice to me, so maybe they will be letting me stay over at jodie's place after eoy!

YAY.

My dad was so funny today.

went to eat at agnus thingy at taka.

Dinner : $500.

#$#$%$^#^%$*!

the food there was awesome shit.

Love the oysters.

and the steak.

and then the lady gave us a complimentary tiramisu birthday cake cause she overheard my dad saying that it was my birthday today and i should drink cocktail instead of sprite tonight.

Yeah exact words of my dad.

"Rachel i think you should drink a cocktail tonight for dinner instead of a sprite because you're 14."

HAHA MY DAD IS SHO KEWL.

So, yeah then went home.

It was a good dinner.

I have home econs to do.

I think i lost my home ec textbook. -bangs head-

ARGH.

sucks.

I am tired.

This is not good.

I have no mood for tuition tomorrow.

happy belated, happy birthday.

2009-09-18T10:29:00.002+08:00

Haha, funny conversation.
I should do this more often with sally since her birthday is one day before mine.
and here goes our conversation.

"Hey sally! happy belated birthday!"

"Haha, happy birthday."

maybe we should try it the other way round the next time.
:D

-

I just read bookie.
omg, brings back super fond memories of tiffany, cheng suan and lyana.
:D
so funny, it almost brought me to tears.
BCCM FTW LA.
i miss Bookie Chit Chat Messenger.
haha, and spazzing around, giving each other crazy nicknames.
and those things happen exactly like 4 years ago, on this very same day.
funny when the friends you thought would stick with you forever then aren't very close to you now, and the friends you fought the most with and hated the most are in the same chinese class as you and still cracking you up like they did the same way 4 years ago.
ahem ahem, tiffany yong min.
haha.

blogging in school now.
chinese.
Bookie is in front of me, haah, i get to keep it.
NO ONE IS ALLOWED TO READ.
partly because we had really bad sentence structures in primary 5 and we sounded stupid.
:x

hazel is scaring me, she is typing crazily on notepad.
She is typing lyricz.
zomg.

Okay, i got a kiss from emily so far, a promised macs meal from hazel, a hug from rena, a going to get bday card from stacy, a very very nice handmade flowers with a very sweet letter from hyu, a funny retarded letter from stacy and quite a number of hugs from namrata and bavithra.

And of course, phonecalls and smses at 12 last night and in the morning.
:D
thanks everyone.

Did i tell you i hate periods, it's the second day today and it SUCKS.

okay, going to talk to the people, cause i don't think i've said a word after i was reading bookie.
Later tonight, got a dinner date...

with the family.

:D

Fall in and fall out.

2009-09-17T17:09:00.002+08:00

I have been sleeping early nowadays.

Real early.

like at 10.

which sucks.

I think my memory is failing me.

I hate it.

Did target settings for FYE today.

fuck k, i have to get like all As to get my targets for overall score.

My As means 80 and above.

Hell yeah, i'll get that. _I_

gg luh.

I can't remember anything else.

Today was a boring day because we had like what 3 free periods.

Consecutively.

Mdm Surayah, miss you. come back.

the only epic thing today was the food fight in the school canteen.

With like 3 tables.

Ownage.

Sarah you suck, you threw chips at me.

When i was just sitting there. D:

Lynette you started the whole fight. HAHA.

nothing else.

I slept during FREE PERIOD today.

I understood chem in science today.

Stacy and I rule.

I am getting excited.

No wait, not now.

Because i haven't memorized alot of shit from chinese yet.

CRAP.

okay i should go now.

2009-09-17T08:33:00.001+08:00

Excited.

Can't help it if you look like an angel.

2009-09-14T15:25:00.003+08:00

Haha, hey stephen is getting into me.

Okay, so yesterday was PESS Netball Carnival.

i swear to god, if i shot in those few shots, we could have gotten into the second round.

but i didn't.

The defenders were damn good yesterday.

And i sucked so bad yesterday.

One sentence to describe it: I cannot shoot for nuts.

Like really really cannot shoot.

I was like so sad, that i felt like screaming to everyone that i'm going to go back to swimming and not do netball and not bring the whole team down and everything.

SIGH.

I screwed up so bad yesterday.

Then went for a very late lunch with hazel cassie and cheryl.

Hazel went to city hall with us then had to go and couldn't eat with us.

Okay so she went on the train ride with us luh.

haha.

Bus ride was...

HAHA.

KAIWEI WINKED AT HAZEL.

tsk tsk.

Train ride was hilarious.

Hazel and her retarded cow facial expressions.

And Cassie being a paparazzi, no, a terrorist.

And her arab name is..

Uh uh.

go see the video on facebook. That should just explain everything. :D

Hazel thought that jurong point was WHITESANDS.

I felt like slapping her.

Seriously.

We were literally at the other end of singapore-

Jurong.

and white sands is like at tampines or pasir ris, idk.

but yeah you get my point.

-_-

Hazel is awesome.

Cheryl thought raffles city was at raffles place mrt.

Even better.

Say hi to my very two good friends, hazel and cheryl.

So-

We went to eat at the Pizza Place at City hall (where i did the carlsberg dare with jamie on valentines')

HAHAH.

I took damn long to eat my food cause it was super spicy.

And then talked and stuff.

Then went to eat yoguru.

Cassie likes to observe people. ALOT.

"Seriously, i wonder how fat people can be so confident of themselves, like they wear so revealing clothes." -Cassie Foo.

And i told her, they can get boyfriend know.

AHA.

then she started going on how those guys who date plump people go for character and stuff and then i gave this really retarded answer "Maybe they like fat people. 8D"

HAAHHA.

I should find a guy who likes fat people to be my boyfriend in the future, cause i'm fat.

HAHA.

Then went to the mrt station with cheryl.

Yeap, that's yesterday well spent.

I think.

TODAY WAS...

lesson to learn : bring coffee to schools when there's boring lessons on that day. And don't bring blueberry bread because i won't eat it in class.

Word of the day: MOH-LEST eu.

HAHAH.

So i guess i'm back to my old habits.

Sleeping in class and wtv.

I WILL CHANGE. D:<

English was.. boring.

History was free period.

I tell you.

Stacy is one.. crazy girl.

(see now i forgot why she is crazy)

She's just really high when i do the Darrell thing.

"excue me, can i tok 2 you fer a mintue"

HAHA.

science, sat with bavithra.

HAHAH SHE WAS SO FUNNY.

oh how i miss sitting next to her. D:

IMY BB.

Premarital Sex and STD is a really sick topic.

but fun when you're having class with jamie jodie and nicole.

History.

Lesson learnt, i suck at malay.

Secrets game.

(though we all don't have secrets anymore, well me and nicole.)

HINT HINT JAMIE JODIE COUGH COUGH.

Went for lunch with esther.

We missed our bus because we went to buy ice cream.

Decided to walk home.

Then we decided to eat char kuay tiao.

Then i'm back home again.

I figured out esther and i have the most outrageous conversations, and it's fun.

NO NETBALL TRAINING FROM NOW TILL EXAMS ARE OVER MANZXZZXZXZZZX.

it's time to grow fat and overweight.

Blog is going to be on hiatus.

Cause i think i am going to surrender my laptop to my mum to keep till exams are over.

SIGH.

Rena we should start stealing quotes from each other. :D

If you are ever going to love me; love me now. While I can know the sweet and tender feelings from which true affection flows. Love me now, while I am living. Do not wait until I am gone. To have those sweet words chiseled in marble on ice-cold stone. If you have tender thoughts of me, please let me know now. Not when I am not there.

-

Remember to always say what you mean. If you love someone, tell them. Don't be afraid to express yourself. Reach out and tell someone what they mean to you. Because when you decide that it is the right time, it might be too late later. Seize the day. Never have regrets. And most importantly, stay close to your friends and family, for they have helped you make you the person that you are today.

2009-09-12T18:23:00.001+08:00

B to the I to the T to the C to the H.

Bitch.

Lesson to learn, don't trust so easily. I think I'd better start learning from my mistakes.

I hate you I don't like you can you get out of my life I thought we were friends I thought you did it too I decided not to fuck you you should screw yourself I trusted you I guess I shouldn't have now I think I have to learn from my mistakes and now I know you're not what I thought you were you carry on with your facade I will carry on with mine same back to you haha I laugh at you I swear to god I will never ever tell you what's going on ever again goodbye because you're not worth being a friend though I am a bitch I keep our conversations a secret thanks so much for your advice love you. Not.

Haha sorry the you are like different yous (:

K bye. Dinner with relatives I don't even know.

2009-09-12T16:05:00.001+08:00

-

2009-09-12T14:53:00.002+08:00

Sorry.

I want you.

2009-09-12T14:51:00.000+08:00

CAN WE GET THIS BACK TO HOW WE USED TO BE.

DO IT

2009-09-11T12:53:00.002+08:00

DO IT. LOVE JUSTIN.

Watch it and you'll love it.

(i can't post up the mv, so here's the acoustic.still awesome shit.)

EVERYONE GET JUSTIN TO COME TO SINGAPORE. :D

View all Singapore events on Eventful

I'd give my everything to be your anything.

2009-09-11T11:53:00.002+08:00

Did i tell you Taylor Swift just writes the best songs that people can relate to.

Not like those shallow rap songs. -__-

Today, i am free.

Thank God it's friday.

I swear i will not cry every night, because my eyes are shrinking.

Thank you Jamie, for last night.

I love you.

He tells a joke, i fake a smile.

But i know all his favourite songs.

And i could tell you,

his favourite colour's green.

He likes to argue,

born on the ~~17th~~ 1st,

his sister's beautiful,

he's got his father's eyes.

And if you ask me if i love him,

i'd lie.

He is sensible and so incredible
and all my single friends are jealous.
He says everything I need to hear
and its like I couldnt ask for anything better.

But I miss screamin and fightin and kissin in the rain
and its 2am and Im cursin your name.
Youre so in love that you act insane
and thats the way I loved you.
And breakin out and comin undone
its a roller coaster kinda rush.
And I never knew I could feel that much.
And thats the way I loved you.

stay sane people, we've got a few more more months to burn till '09 is over.

Me + u , lemme tell u 1 time.

2009-09-10T22:03:00.001+08:00

For all the broken hearts, broken souls, and veryvery sane minds out there.

Heal fast, the world can't wait.

One day you’re gonna want that girl. That girl that knew she wasn’t perfect, but tried to be perfect for you. The girl that believed the scraps of you she was given were worth it, because something was better than nothing. That girl who wanted nothing more than to be there for you, and loving you was the only way she could. The girl who sees your flaws, but values them as much as your strengths. That girl who still can’t bring herself to hate you, even though sometimes you probably deserve it. That girl who saw past your pretty eyes and treasured parts of you that no one else has ever appreciated. The girl who realizes she may never have your heart, but will carry the image of you in hers forever. The girl that sees this and still loves you. The girl that should have you, but doesn’t.. Even though she deserves it. ”

Reality dreams reality again.

2009-09-10T13:15:00.002+08:00

So, i woke up with a fever, cough and a slight flu.

Will be going for training in about 10 minutes.

I marvel at myself.

Tuition, (CHINESE) at 7pm tonight.

I had to memorize 2 paragraphs from a fricking poem about chopsticks.

-_-

I really hope i can live through today.

Of course i can.

Of course i will.

I think i should think more positively.

It helps sometimes.

Knowing that it's not your fault cause you just put the blame on someone or something.

But deep inside you, you know it's still your fault.

But like i said, it helps. Temporarily.

(kay i know i make no sense)

I doubt i'll be blogging again tonight,

after tuition, plonk on the bed and sleep.

Sleep sleep sleep.

For once, jamie is so right.

Sleeping helps you to escape from everything.

Every single thing.

Sleeping helps.

I love you, sleeping.

Don't try to call.

OH WAIT.

No one calls now.

What the hell, haha.

I laugh at myself.

My life is so mundane.

TWIN!

LET'S ALL BE HAPPY ON OUR BIRTHDAY OKAY! :D

i will be happy.

i must be happy.

i can be happy.

i think i'll be making the same wish i make like every single year.

Yeah, i think i would.

though like every year, the same wish doesn't come true.

Whatever, wishes don't come true right.

So yeah, i think it's either the same wish or a wish for a unicorn.

K, training, here i come.

Gr.

2009-09-10T13:10:00.002+08:00

WHERE DID I GO WRONG, I LOST A FRIEND.

you're right, it was a wrong choice.

Wrong decisions, wrong words at the wrong time.

Hope you're happy where you are now.

Everybody, say hi to my new best friend,

silence. who will love and care for me forever and that's not a lie

I will be happy i must be happy.

Goodbyes are always constant in life, i should embrace it.

So to you, Goodbye.

So sick of love songs, so tired of tears.

2009-09-09T21:43:00.002+08:00

Hi.

It's 09.09.09

How great.

My left leg is like 1/3 wrapped up.

Cause i went to the sinseh today, it was mother effing painful when the doctor was like rubbing the part where it had that stupid lump thing.

I wanted to scream so bad, and the doc was still so calm, asking how old i was and what sports i play when i was practically dying there.

Then i went home.

Then i watched "spectacular!". Again.

Not bad actually.

NOLAN IS SO FRICKING HOT.

(though his name sounds.. gay.)

HE IS SO HOT HE IS SO HOT.

Then went for tuition for 4 bloody hours.

My brain is drained now.

And i still have to complete chinese homework cause i have chinese tuition tomorrow.

And then i have math tuition (or science?) at like 10am tomorrow. Shit. D:

Then training.

Then tuition.

CRIES CRIES CRIES.

Thursday is going to be G-R-E-A-T.

I am actually getting used at the fact that i don't talk on the phone when i'm on the bed anymore.

Though i secretly bring up my phone just in case. just in case someone calls. But, when i wake up the next day, nothing.

Okay, so that's how i spent 09.09.09. Hope it was just as fun-filled and wonderful just like yours.

Wtf, i said "Singaporeans can't sing" on Yiu Jin's fb, and his A math teacher come argue with me.

-__-

Type some shitload of words for me to see and called me "Ms Rachel."

I don't even know who the fuck you are, don't come argue with me.

Not in a good mood nowadays.

I'm sticking to ice cream and chocolates to keep me sane (almost) every night.

Just let it be.

2009-09-08T22:11:00.002+08:00

Today-

training.

I have officially learnt how to shoot properly, at least now my shooting percentage has a vast increase from a -100% to a 10%? yes. :D

Good job Rachel.

went to study at t3 with jamie and hyu.

Was it me or was it damn hot down there at macs. O:

Jamie was sleeping while reading her chinese text.

I think the only one that actually concentrated was hyu.

I completed chinese homework (half of it), and a little bit of math.

I think i like algebra.

Linear graphs, go screw yourselves.

I think quotes are just as meaningful as lyrics.

Wanna know how i'm feeling now.

What i'm thinking now?

(if you actually care)

BAM.

Here goes.

“ I hate when you’re thinking about something and you refuse to tell me what it is. It makes me second guess myself. Did I say something wrong? Did I not remember something I should have? Are you thinking of someone else you’d rather be with? I hate not knowing. ”

It’s amazing the things you realize when you lose someone. You get mad at yourself for not saying the things you could have said a million times. You take for granted the days you spent doing nothing when you could have been with them. Anyone can be taken, at any point in our lives, but we always wait until they’re gone to say the things we never had the courage to say. ”

“ The one thing I hate the most is saying goodbye. It’s never been easy for me. I mean, how do you approach the concept of goodbye? Goodbyes are all different. Some are for a day, some are for a month. But others are forever. And the concept of forever is hard to accept. It’s like, hey, I’m never going to see you again, goodbye. It doesn’t feel complete. But I think that’s what goodbyes are. They’re incomplete and you honestly don’t know how long the goodbye will last. It’s a part of life. ”

“ There’s a point in your life when you know who stays forever, and who’s just around for a while. People change, but so do you. Sometimes for the best, and sometimes for the worst. Bad things happen to everyone, you’re not in it alone. People lie, and some people just don’t care how you feel. Your heart beats, no matter how much pain you’re in. Everything will be okay eventually. There are always people in your life that just make your day, no matter the miles. I know about distance, I’ve been dealing with it all my life, don’t tell me it’s easy, because it’s not. But it’s worth it. I’d rather keep in touch with the people I love, than just drop it and forget about it. You don’t forget the ones you love. It doesn’t work like that. Give it all you’ve got and live your life to the fullest. People would kill to be you, have what you have, someone always has it worse off than you, but that doesn’t mean that your pain doesn’t count. ”

“ The saddest kind of sad is the sad that tries not to be sad. You know, when Sad tries to bite

its lip and not cry and smile and go, “No, I’m happy for you”? That’s when it’s really sad. ”

(AGREED)

I’ll always remember that night that you looked into my eyes.

You looked deep inside and found something no one ever saw.

I’ll always remember the night that we stared at each other for a little too long.

You took me as I was and never questioned my values.

I’ll always remember the night that we became more than friends.

You saw a different side of me, and I took you for all you were.

I’ll always remember the night you left me standing in the dark.

You turned off the light, and I haven’t been able to find a way to turn it back on.

And I’ll always remember today when I saw you sitting there smiling.

I have never wanted back anything more than I want you back in my life. ”

“ You know, “I love you” is one of the greatest originally unoriginal phrases ever created. I mean it just seems so easy to say, three small, simple words that anyone can come up with. It’s been said about a billion times before, in every love story, in every relationship. But when you’re on your last sheet of paper, struggling desperately for the right words, it’s beautiful. I love you. And when the right person says it to you, and means it, it sounds like the most amazing combination of words in the English language. Not only that, but it sounds like it was written just for you. So creative and wonderful is the phrase “I love you”. ”

(AGREED)

“ You know what I want more than anything in the world right now? To talk to you, to be with you, this very instant. I want to sit across from you Indian style and look into your eyes and see for myself exactly how they change color in the light. I want to hold your hand in the palm of mine, and trace every line with my fingertips. ”

“ I thought about life, about how we feel lonely, sometimes to the point of tears, but we don’t let those tears come because we are not supposed to cry. Or how we feel a surge of love for a partner but we don’t say anything because we’re frozen with fear of what those words might do. ”

“ I want to know exactly what makes you tick,

I want to know your problems.

I want to know what days you’re waking up on the wrong side of the bed;

I want to know how many pillows you sleep with.

I want to know why you sleep with a window open.

I want to know if I’m ever needed,

if I’m good enough to keep you warm at night time.

I want to know if I even have a chance anymore.

I want to know everything about you,

whether it be fact or fiction.

I want to know your past, your future, your in-betweens.

Your favorite colors, your phobias; everything. ”

“ The greatest irony of love; loving the right person at the wrong time, having the wrong person when the time is right and finding out you love someone right after that person walks out of your life. And sometimes, you think you’re already over a person, but when you see them smile at you, you’ll suddenly realize that you’re just pretending to be over them just to ease the pain of knowing that they will never be yours again. For some, they think that letting go is one way of expressing how much they love that person. Some are afraid to see the one they love being held by someone else. Most relationships tend to fail not because the absence of love. Love is always present. It’s just that one was being loved too much and the other was being love too little. As we all know that the heart is the center of the body but it beats on the left. Maybe that’s the reason why the heart is not always right. Most often we fall in love with the person we think we love but to only discover that for them, we are just for passing time while the one who truly loves us remains either a friend or a stranger. So here’s a piece of advice; let go when you’re hurting too much, give up when love isn’t enough, and move on when things are not like before. For sure there is someone out there who will love you even more. ”

“ Love doesn’t always come dressed in the package we want. It doesn’t arrive on our schedule and it doesn’t follow our guidelines and rules. It is love. It is intangible, unpredictable, and certainly uncontrollable. This is what makes it so wonderful. We need to remember to be grateful and honored by its presence in our lives. Be careful to not let it pass you by just because it doesn’t present itself the way you think it should.

“ Cute is when a person’s personality shines through their looks. Like, in the way they walk. Every time you see them, you just want to run up and hug them. ”

“ I don’t know what it is about you, maybe it’s the way nothing else matters when we’re talking, or how you make me smile more than anyone else has. It could be the way that you say the exact right thing at exactly the right time. But whatever it is, I just want you to know that it means everything to me. ”

“ Hope is always there. When things aren’t going well, you feel something inside saying that things will soon get better; a hope for good things to come. Hope is there when you first have a crush on someone, it’s the electricity type feeling you get when you see that person; when you’re smiling because of them. It’s the feeling that, well, maybe this person is going to be that person.. maybe this is going to be something amazing. It’s the hope that something more will come from something simple. ”

“ Love isn’t a maybe thing, you know when you love someone. ”

“ I suck with words, but sometimes words aren’t the thing. Love isn’t about words, it’s about what you do. And what I did, running away, it was stupid. We both know love is a big, scary, evil concept. But if you feel it, it’s going to follow you around like a hungry dog. I didn’t mean to say that love is a dog. I just mean I’m not going anywhere. I love you. If love beats us up, lets just beat it up right back. We can do this. If you’re ready to make the jump, I’ll be right there to catch you. ”

“ I’d love to tell you that everything’s going to be okay. That’s what everyone told me, but it’s just not. You can stay here or you can go back; either way, it’s going to suck. But I figured at least when it sucks, you know you’re alive. I guess what I’m trying to say is, it’s okay when everything sucks. It means you’re somewhere. ”

I never asked for it to be over. Then again, I never asked for it to begin. That’s the way it is with life, some of the most beautiful days come completely by chance.But even the most beautiful days have their sunsets. ”

And the truth is, I’m scared of you. I’ve never felt so drawn to another person, so much that it’s impossible to keep my distance. And I’m scared that you don’t feel the same way. ”

“ It’s the way he makes you smile. How every joke he tells you is hilarious, how he can annoy the hell out of you one second, and make you feel like someone special the next. The way he says your name even makes you get though life. You start catching yourself looking his way more often, hoping he’s looking at you too. Then you start getting nervous whenever you talk to him. His instant messages become more meaningful to you, even if you can’t remember what he was talking about, or if it was anything important at all. Then you were too busy choosing what outfit to wear to school the next day, or whether he’d notice at all. You see his face everywhere, not just at school. And you think about him more and more often each day. Suddenly, the pieces all start making sense and you realize - you’re truly in love.

Because it's you that i see.

Byebye.

2009-09-07T22:22:00.003+08:00

STOP IT I AM FUCKING FINE I AM LAUGHING I AM SMILING I AM HAPPY DON'T WORRY BOUT ME WORRY BOUT YOURSELF AND YOUR FUCKING THOUGHTS KAY KNOW WHAT I AM STARTING TO REGRET TOO I PUT TOO MUCH HOPE IN THIS I SHOULD JUST RUN AWAY I SHOULD JUST GIVE UP CAN WE START ALL OVER I DON'T KNOW THIS TIME I AM SAYING IT TRULY FROM THE HEART I DONT KNOW I NEVER SHOULD HAVE SAID IF THEN IT'LL ALL BE FINE I SHOULD HAVE BEEN LESS PARANOID MORE OF MYSELF BUT HEY GUESS WHAT I AM SORRY THAT I DID ALL THIS I DON'T EVEN KNOW IF YOU'RE HURTING MAYBE MAYBE NOT BUT IT'D BE STUPID REALLY STUPID IF YOU DIDN'T GIVE A FUCK AND AT THE END OF THE DAY I JUST ENDED UP HURTING MYSELF SO SORRY CAN WE START ANEW PLEASE I CANNOT I SWEAR TO GOD I CANNOT STAND COLD CONVERSATIONS AND THE VERY FEW TOPICS WE HAVE LEFT ON THE PHONE AND I MISS YOU AS A FRIEND IDC IF WE EVER GET TOGETHER OR NOT I JUST WANT YOU BACK AS A FRIEND I MISS YOU CAN WE PLEASE GO BACK TO WHAT WE WERE.

Forget me not.

2009-09-07T18:21:00.002+08:00

4 hours of chinese tuition today.

Last two hours were compo.

I tell you, this is one of the lessons i will never ever forget.

Chinese compo: Teenagers dating.

my teacher is the bomb, she explained all this till it became sex ed.

HAHA.

"Wo men nu hai zi, xiang yi duo hua."

and the funny thing is, i am the only girl with like, 2 poopheads that i've known for like 4years.

And it was funny and awkward at the same time.

Today was fun.

"Forget about everything" session was good.

4 hours (i think?) in the food court can sometimes drive us a little bonkers.

Haha.

"forget about everything" session was full of :

Bitching.

Laughing.

Gaying.

with all the...

"OMG SICK!"

"OMG FUCK! GROSS"

"OMG NEVER IN MY LIFE."

"WTF?!"

"YEAH OMG LA!"

and hmmm, secrets. Hhaha.

Bitching is quite fun, actually.

YEAH AND YOUR DECISIONS DAMN OWN.

missed the bus. :D

Iris is telling the truth.

I believe Iris kay.

thank you, for letting me forget.

Though it's like temporary, it lasted for like 4 hours?

Imma dead beat.

Bk called just now.

Yes jodie, NOW you can start going crazy. -_-

ha ha.

funny when you say it.

and even funnier when i hear it.

I guess if you love someone,

you just have to be ready to fall.

Even when you're not in a relationship and he's breaking your heart and he doesn't even know it yet.

Just,

fall.

stop hoping.

2009-09-07T00:03:00.001+08:00

It's 12am.

It's the bloody morning.

It's not "tonight" already.

Too little too late.

Off to sleep.

Don't even try.

It's over.

2009-09-06T23:01:00.005+08:00

It's over.

Finally, i got my BM cert.

YAY.

Second try and i passed!

whoo hoo.

Thank you amanda for being so awesome, and i love the present! :D

BM TRAINING IS OVER.

say hi to rachel, the awesome person who is certified to be a pool lifeguard now. :D

heh heh heh.

I am so happy.

I should be happy.

Aw i'm gonna miss everyone.

Amanda.

What's her name again? (whenever i remember sze chuan, i cannot remember hers. whenever i remember hers, i cannot remember sze chuan haha)

Ai Chin

Brandon

Sze Chuan

Arthur

Our coach IVAN.

thank you for pulling my hair during the first lesson.

It finally came to good use during the last lesson when i had to do initiative and when Mo climbed onto me-

i had a sudden flashback of you pulling my hair.

thank you. haha.

Yes.

IT IS OVER AND OUT OF MY LIFE.

okay.

Didn't go to church today.

cause my dad decided to spend some family time at the army open house.

Went there with cousins.

i swear, my dad was treating us like some freakshow.

Me-

i think.

I think by the end of the whole thing right, everyone there would know my name.

He shouts my name like i'm deaf or something.

"RACHEL GO TAKE PICTURE!"

"RACHEL STAND THERE GO TAKE PICTURE"

"OMG RACHEL SO NICE! LOOK AT THAT TANK! GO CLIMB UP TAKE PICTURE!"

my reply was "sure dad! :D (_I_)"

anyway, i think army guys in their uniform are quite cute. :D

why are there girls in army camps?!

seriously.

and somemore so girly ones. O:

whatever, their choice.

but i have like one burning question..

how on earth do they like do all like the training with their period..

quite gross right.

you roll in the mud when you have your period..

sick.

it was quite interesting though..

Bryan was right.

Adventure land was fun.

Though i didn't do any of the obstacle courses.

Paiseh ahah.

then went to eat chicken rice.

then went home.

played guitar.

slept.

Jamie was right.

the best way to escape from everything is to just, sleep.

you should try it.

Hur hur, jodie thought i was okay all along.

Well, truth is.

I'm not.

I was never okay.

but i guess you never knew.

haw haw, my acting skills improved.

I am happy.

i should sleep more often.

It lets me forget.

k tuition tomorrow from 8am to 12 noon.

Let's all cry.

Then lunch with X.

I think i'm gonna have fun in the afternoon.

Let us all cheer up.

smile poops.

stay sane.

Haven't heard from you in a while.

2009-09-04T21:01:00.003+08:00

My very epic beauty sleep last friday.

Sorry the booked sucked, it was about plastic surgery! -_-

And that was the only chair i could get.

My brother is a pain in the butt.

I wanna cry.

He has his own bloody room and acts like he hasn't and squeezes on my table to use his mega huge ass laptop with me. (yes pamela, it's the bigbig dell one)

WHY DO I HAVE A BROTHER LIKE HIM.

i seriously cannot wait till he's like 14 when he gets a girlfriend or when his social life grows (vastly) and i can go out on saturdays without him questioning me every 2 minutes when i'm deciding on what to where on who i'm going out with, why am i going out, why am i deserting him and how am i going home. And alot more. And i can have my own room, and when he'll finally leave me alone. And when i can talk on the phone in peace and without him bombarding me with questions like am i talking to my boyfriend or he'll start saying random names he has heard of me talking about. It's just like interrogation session everytime i'm on the phone with someone.

I swear he's a billion times worse than my mum and dad COMBINED.

And guess what, he's only 10.

Bloody hell, got 4 more years.

And my brother attracts my dad.

AND MY DAD COMES INTO THE ROOM AND DEMANDS I PLAY FOR HIM SONGS ON THE GUITAR.

-_-

sheesh.

Hi dad.

You don't close the door when you come in, i don't like you.

Go out.

I am not your monkey.

I want money from you.

You owe me.

School was..

fun.

HAHA DID I TELL YOU ME AND STACY ARE JUST REALLY KEWL DURING LEGACY.

We had conflicts, again for legacy.

and then we had to think of sentence to resolve conflicts, and apparently stacy said i sounded like a bitch.

AHAH.

"Mdm Surayah, is bitchy a mood?"

HAAH.

ANYWAY, STACY AND MY SENTENCES FOR PART A & B FOR THE CONFLICTS ARE AWESOME SHITZXZ.

Shut up pamela & jamie. -_-

I have a dying temptation to type jamie's name as James.

hahah.

Got back progress report.

Fuck you.

I hate you.

I have to study harder.

study camp in sept.

Went to macs.

I think i lost my mind for a while there.

Jamie was very disgusted and scared.

Sorry poop. :/

MEGA MCSPICY UPSIZED.

yum.

Haven't eaten that in like..

AGES.

i was hungry.

And sad.

why can't people eat alot when they're hungry and sad. ):

sheesh.

Anyway, i was looking through the photos, and jodie didn't post quite a number of photos during drama night ahah.

I LOOKED QUITE OKAY IN THOSE PICTURES SHE DIDN'T POST UP KAYZ!

Went high for i forgot what reason.

And then went to namrata's place.

Watched "the uninvited"

(SORRY AFIFAH I PROMISE I'LL WATCH AGAIN, I WANT TO ANYWAY)

ITS DAMN BLOODY GOOD.

Thing i realised about horror movies:

They make you think alot.

Like they psycho you.

Or maybe it's just me, but they just don't scare you, they just make you think.

The uninvited is a good example.

It's damn bloody good.

And they just like practically left me hanging there, and the omg feeling.

Just like the first time when i watched dead silence.

I wanna watch the uninvited again.

The girls there are hot anyway.

K you can ignore the stuff i wrote about the movie.

It's damn bloody good anyway.

100 stars for it. :D

There is hot air expelling from the god damn bloody huge ass lap top and is practically burning my arm. D:

Daniel taught me how to solo.

-_-

I think i suck at it.

Thank you.

Namrata figured out chords, ahah.

then finished guitar, she went to talk to some retarded dude online, and it was so funny.

She lied to him that she was going to dubai and needed a place to stay and wanted to stay at his place, in his room.

AHAH.

And apparently, the guy likes her. :D

Then i'm home.

Is it me, or home cooked food never tasted as great as before.

I think it's just me.

I missed it too much.

Oh and i am very, very sore about the fact that-

yesterday morning, my aunt called and told me oh, my cousin's going to sydney to see korkor, and she asked if i wanted to go in like 2 weeks' time. And i was like omg, SYDNEY?!

And yeah, she wanted to bring me shopping and everything, and i had to HAD TO (for the love of exams) say no.

I'm sorry i can't go because i have to be a very hardworking girl and study hard and get stuff into my brain and let god see how hardworking i am and let me have good end of the year results so i can go into the stream i want to get into, so i am sorry ayi pat sorry sydney, i can't go have a good time with you and go horseback riding, or go scuba diving, or go shopping, or go shopping, or go shopping again.

Sorry.

I have to study.

Look at the sacrifices i made for studying.

I better get damn bloody good results next term.

Because i just gave up a free trip (ALL EXPENSES PAID) trip to Sydney, and a chance to ride a horse.

I am sad.

4 hours of tuition tomorrow. D:

I AM SAD.

2 hours math 2 hours science.

shit shit shit.

Then i have to sit down and pack everything on my table because i have be procrastinating for like, 2 weeks.

Then i have to memorise stuff from chinese tuition.

SIGH.

for the love of exams for the love of exams for the love of exams for the love of exams for the love of exams for the love of exams for the love of exams for the love of exams for the love of exams for the love of exams.

FOR THE BLOODYHELL LOVE OF BULLSHITBULLCRAP EXAMS I WILL WORK HARD.

If we look back.

2009-09-03T19:03:00.004+08:00

I miss them so much.

bloody hell. D:

6H WE NEED A GATHERINGGGGG!

I miss everyone so so so much!

K nothing interesting happened today.

NICOLE HAS A VERY GOOD ENGLAND TODAY WE WILL ALL LAUGH AT HER FACE NOW.

First sentence :

"I WILL RELEASE MY HAIR."

Second sentence :

"I WILL POKE OUT MY EYES!"

hahah.

So funny.

We made pizza today!

I am happy.

Though my crust was really thin, but it didn't taste that bad when it went hard -_-

Drama ed.

Sigh, my group likes to isolate jamie.

and i become the "Refugee Scum" in the dramatization haha.

Science.

Sick as ever.

Stuff that people use from conceiving.

DAMN SICK PLEASE.

Mrs tan then goes on to tell us on how this dude that went for a sex change (from female to male) got married (to a woman) and wanted to have babies, and his wife wasn't healthy enough to have a baby.

So?

HE CARRIED THE BLOODY BABY FOR THEM, WHY?

cause when he "felt" that it was right of him to be a man, he didn't remove his female sex organs!

And then, he injected some bloody weird thing, that made him grow a sick small deformed penis (apparently) and bloody shit.

It was the most disgusting thing EVER.

So this dude,

has a v hole and a penis.

SICK.

PLAIN SICK.

And a deformed one.

ew.

AND THEN.

Imagine, the dude-

with a beard and whatever,

WITH A HUGE TUMMY CAUSE HE'S PREGNANT.

wth.

People are just insane.

Tomorrow's friday.

Is it me or is time passing really quickly now.

I felt like monday was just yesterday.

I miss all my friends, suddenly.

But baby i figured you out.

2009-09-02T20:25:00.003+08:00

Did i tell you these bitches never fail to make my day.

Mdm Surayah should be proud of me and Stacy.

After 10 mintues of revising how to write a complain letter, we immediately started on ours.

I first wrote my complain letter about stacy, which sent her laughing like some mad woman and mdm S's reaction was classic,

"Stacy, did you forget to take your medicine?"

HAHAAH.

OWNAGE.

And then she took my lovely letter away from stacy, but we got it in the end.

And then stacy wrote me her complain letter which made me laugh like crazy, and i think mdm S couldn't stand us.

-_-

So funny la.

And Jamie was playing with a nail filer and got suaned by Mdm S.

"You play somemore, i use it to file your teeth."

HAHA

But whatever, best english class.

"SEXTON."

HAHAHAH.

We have also learnt a new lingo from our passage of informal letters.

OUTSTANDING = BOSS.

ways on how to use it in a sentence " OH EM GEE, THAT GIRL IS SO BOSS."

Nothing else happened.

We ended school at 1 today, free lunch = shitty food.

I felt like i was eating plastic..

We had i think 1 hour 45 min in class.

So we played i have never, and some truth game.

Pamela ah, so straightforward.

It was fun knowing people's secrets heh heh.

then there was like this long long chinese award thingy, just china people spamming my ears with their high pitched cheena accent which almost made me bonkers.

Our principal spoke in chinese! I am so proud of her.

She sounded like she was dying though :x.

After it was over, jamie jodie nicole and i went completely bonkers at or seats.

We have officially found another school that has a worse uniform compared to ours.

Went to subway (AGAIN) for dinner with jodie and jamie, and then to ICC cause darren owed Jodie money.

And jamie was pestering Darren for $4 cause apparently he owed her that amount since, last year.

HA HA i laugh at you.

Then here i am at home.

I am going to do home ec now, if not i tomorrow cannot make pizza. D:

Birthday wishes made.

Hope it'll come true.

Jamie you know right.

Sigh.

Sorry

baby, please tell me.

2009-09-01T20:45:00.002+08:00

DID I TELL YOU I MISS MY LONG HAIR. D':

And i hate it when you say.

2009-09-01T17:57:00.002+08:00

One word to describe today:

UNPRODUCTIVE.

I am starting to feel guilty for not studying and just sleeping for the whole of today.

Damn the rain.

I wrote two songs last night.

And i wanted to complete my third but then it was 1am and i was practically falling asleep.

So i gave up.

haha.

Thank you for the encouragements before i started on the song.

Thanks to Hui yu & cheryl.

haha.

Yes hyu, i'll write with you one day.

Last night-

Horrible.

But thank you jamie for cheering me up with your "Pedophile alert" thing.

HAHA.

and im glad you could listen to me.

love you jamie.

Sorry Bryan.

Hope you got the sms.

Okay so here's the first song i wrote. :D

Hope you like it.

I, personally am super proud of the song! :D haha.

Verse 1.

We used to be the best friends that anyone could ever have,

we used to laugh and cry together,

never thought that this would ever falter.

You called me in the night,

and we talked till the morning light.

And we had so much fun,

and i never want,

i never want to let you go.

pre-chorus

But something went wrong.

And it came to soon,

friendship was lost,

and i miss you.

chorus

They say that we'll last forever,

that we we were meant to be together.

But baby, can't they see.

That you're not the one for me.

And though i thought you were,

all that are left are memories of you and me.

Verse 2

My friends they tell me that,

you're not worth the time,

but why are you still on my mind?

They tell me to let you go,

but deep inside i know.

That i don't want to let you go that far.

pre-chorus

But something went wrong,

and it came too soon.

Friendship was lost,

and i miss you.

(chorus)

Bridge

And i was tryin',

trying.

To forget who you really are.

(x2)

Chorus

They say that we'll last forever,

that we were meant to be together.

Baby can't they see...

(CHORUS)

When they say that we'll last forever,

that we were meant to be together.

Now baby,

please tell me.

Why i can't let you go.

You were my best friend.

2009-08-31T17:19:00.002+08:00

i was in my daddy's working shirt and with his really gay tie today.

I think i rocked.

Happy teachers' day.

Had fun.

Was supposed to catch the grudge 3 at zel's place.

Watched the grudge one & the simpsons.

With Rena, Tasha & Affifah.

It's so amusing when we get off the bus and have only 9 minutes till mac breakfast is over.

We RUN.

I fell asleep for both movies.

SPIDER PIG.

haha.

Yesterday was funfunfun.

Go munchkins!

I love playing that game.

We should have more fellowship.

One word game never fails to cheer me up.

Writing on whiteboards with keith is so entertaining.

We should do it more often huh keith.

We had the ultimate showdown-

tic tac toe.

HAHAHA.

SO FUNNY.

Everyone was watching.

Sentence of the day:

"Mark use markers to write our marks!"

HAHAHAH.

Keith and I are awesome peeps.

Songtao can make awesome egg with bacon thingy and am can make nicenice cookies.

Munchkins is fun.

I like it.

I won the first round.

I miss fellowship D:

I like mark's camera.

Saturday was really fun.

Baybeats.

FOR THIS CYCLE.

Weiwen.

He's shy.

And i like his smile.

My gosh, speaking of which, i keep have weirder dreams by the day.

Seriously, i am going insane.

HAHA TO PAM & JODIE, BETTER SHARDUP.

(omg, i forgot i blogged about baybeats on sat. -_-)

K, that's all.

I wrote a song, and apparently, people say it's nice.

yayme.

Lyrics below aren't from my song though.

But they speak what i feel. :D

Wait for me on Monday's afternoon
I've marked this day down
Alright, you said, but you never really turn up
Never even showed up
And that's how I let it all go

You say the sweetest things
But you didn't mean them at all
All you wanted was to end it all

This is the reason why I loved you
But this is the reason why I fall
Out of your mind
And out of your hands
Over and over again and I,
I don't know if I can cry ever again
Cos it's gone

I knew better, than to let you break my heart.

2009-08-29T22:07:00.004+08:00

there, the most epic fall ever.

If only jodie took a video.

haha.

Today was great fun.

I like the esplanade.

we should go there more often.

Marina Square starbucks is quite nice to study at.

went to study there, then went to watch "for the cycle" perform.

he's so shy!

but cute.

ahaha.

Then went to the rooftop to slack and camwhore, which was super great fun.

Our tourist instincts were kicking in then.

i think jamie and i make great models haha.

then went to marina square for dinner.

Jamie can't eat spicy for nuts.

She tried a sip of my soup and drank i think GULPS of her water after that.

haha i laugh at you fong.

Went to topshop, tried on retarded things.

Jodie finally bought her highwaisted shorts.

I am proud of you.

went to some guitar shop at esplanade.

SUPER COOL.

I PLAYED THE ELECTRIC GUITAR.

and jamie played "i am cow" on the electric.

HAAH.

and our faces totally went down the drain when the dude said," oh you should play more of power chords"

then her proceeds to play like 3 chords i think, and there, our faces on the bloody floor.

hahah.

I can't really remember what else happened.

the two Js were being complete retards in the mrt, that's for sure.

Can't wait till photos are uploaded.

jodie hurry upload them.

I am getting giddy idk why. O:

I want to write a song.

First, i shall finish learning crazier.

Starbucks was so funny with the two of them.

I actually managed to complete all my chinese tuition homework and a wee bit of history.

We should study like that more often.

I can't wait till tomorrow, when i get the chance to say ~~yes~~ NO.

caught you at the corner of my eye.

2009-08-28T22:52:00.002+08:00

AHAH STUDY TOMORROW.

esplanade.

then concert later baby.

today was so funny.

I cannot believe i slept through lit.

fuck, apparently there were alot of hints.

but jamie jodie nicole sam were nice poops and told me the hints.

that questions will repeat and main characters will pop out.

keep that in mind.

Epic story of the day/ week:

There was this paper outside pp macs (near the stairs there), and then jamie wanted to drag nicole to say hi to zhenhong, so jamie was pulling nicole by the hand and nicole dramatically trying to make her let go, but failed miserably. and the rest of us (lavelle sam & jodie) were just standing there. And then there was this paper on the floor, and then i just casually thought that jamie was gonna slip on that and then i'd start laughing.

Then she really did. She slid on that and she almost did a split, and then because she was holding nicole, nicole also lost her balance,and fell so spastically as well. HAHAHA.

Damn funny i swear. I even laughed till i cried. (which i don't usually do)

And i think everyone heard us laugh like maniacs.

we were still laughing while crossing the junction manz.

that's how funny it was.

The most amazing thing i did for the day:

I managed to sleep at borders while sitting on a small little chair reading a book.

I slept in borders.

I think i have issues.

I am very tired, but i can't get over the song "showstopper" by AJ Rafael.

he's good.

Asians CAN sing, and there are those that ARE pretty.

Tuition tomorrow.

sigh.

Let's all cry.

I really, really, really like you.

Could have loved you all my life if you didn't leave me waiting in the cold.

2009-08-27T22:14:00.002+08:00

Today.

I couldn't train properly.

Sorry ruiyu, i sucked at throwing, causing your finger to swell.

I am really sorry.

Sorry sam i sucked at pair ball today.

Heard something from Maryanne.

Sigh.

Thank you Cassie, i didn't know you could comfort so well.

Love you.

Bryan, please call me, i needa talk to you.

Urgently.

Before sunday.

Cause i figured sunday is fellowship and i can't wait till that long to tell & ask you something.

Seriously.

ha ha.

I like banana crumble, thank god nicole didn't grill hers.

Mdm Yante suan-ed me cause i didn't know green beans become tow gey.

REALLY I MEAN WHO KNEW THAT LA.

walao.

and she called me a "beanbo"

tsk.

break my heart.

i can't wait till monday.

Teachers' day.

performing for our class.

Primary school later baby!

i shall call mistika soon.

My left ankle is a bitchbitchbitch i tell you.

hurts like mad now.

I going to see sinseh tomorrow.

crap.

I don't like the sinseh.

What else is there to blog about.

After training, bubble tea with jodie.

Thank you jodie.

Love you.

I am sorry, my life is damn screwed now.

I WISH YOU NEVER ACTUALLY CAME INTO MY LIFE.

NOW I KNOW WHO YOU ARE, I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN FROM THE START. AND DON'T EVEN TRY TO LIE, BECAUSE THIS IS GOODBYE.